Dancing with the Stars Series 7- Episode 1
The teeth were bleached, the fake tans were on, and the chests were waxed, which must mean Dancing With The Stars was back on TV.
The has been much disgruntlement about whether some of the contestants had the prerequisite amount of fame to be on the show. However since anyone can schlep onto any old reality tv show and be called a celebrity and considering some of these people have done more then be turkey slapped I think they filled the criteria. Saying that there were a couple of contestants who barely nudged my celeb radar.
As I have said in a previous So You Think You Can Dance Post http://realityravings.blogspot.com/2007/09/so-you-think-you-can-dance-final-18.html
If you come from an Eastern Block country is it compulsory to be a ballroom dancer. The majority of dancers this year appear to be of Russian origin. I think for any man who wants to take a Russian bride salsa lessons may be compulsory.
Darryl Somers reminded me of a ring master and seemed a bit flat none of his opening intro really had any zing in it.
The co-ordination of Corrine Grant, and Patti Newtown were called into question when they seemed to have difficulty getting down the stairs however Patti Newtown soon put any geriatric rumours to rest with a showstopping performance.
And Do and Luda were first up with the Cha Cha – it was a cross between a Jackie Chan show, and those blaxploitation movies of the seventies. I think Quentin Tarantino would have approved.
Helen Ritchie the judge started as she means to continue by perving – she needs to get a toyboy and fast.
Elka Graham and Micheal were next with the quickstep. She certainly showed Darryl that he is a midget. I thought she looked stunning in an otherwise dull routine.
Mark Beretta and Linda then came on with the Cha Cha – He looked so gay – I don’t know if he is nor do I care however it was the first word that popped into my head when he started dancing.
The strategy of Channel 7 became apparent when the judges were assessing him. Gush, Gush, Gush, and then a bit about how great Sunrise is. They obviously want to keep their own stars on the show for awhile to raise their profiles. They scored a high 27 for a pretty stiff and uncoordinated routine, and he also had his mouth open the whole time.
David Hobson and Karina did a nice little quickstep, and thought he was probably the best dancer of the night apart from Bridie Carter.
Michael Klim and Eliza did a quickstep, and I predict he will be the first one to go, because of the combination of a bland routine with a bland personality. The judges gave it the caning it deserved.
Corinne Grant and Csaba had a stab at the Cha Cha, ok a bit uncoordinated. I love Corrine however she is not bringing the sexy back.
Bridie Carter and Craig did a quick step and stamped their authority on the competition that they were the ones to beat. It was probably in the top two routines of the night.
James and Olga – No idea who he is – some sort of V8 racing car driver thought I would not like him, but actually did. And wow is Olga a little firecracker. She was indeed channelling the saucy video clip of the song they were dancing too – “Destination Unknown” where the singer simulates masturbation with a horn instrument.
Now the moment we had been waiting for Jessica Rowe and Serghei dancing the quickstep. Channel 7 had used her alot in their pre show publicity so clearly are trying to improve her profile. I suspect they will decide what to do with her once they see how far she goes on the show. Late night bulletins if she bombs out.
The routine was very stiff, and she does seem to have the body of a praying mantis, but she seemed to enjoy herself. I look forward to seeing her improve.
And then the penultimate moment Patti Newton and Sandro doing the Cha Cha – She was just great – no lame Dawn Fraser type dancing for her. She strutted her stuff and sizzled. Bert has got a hot little tomali there. I really enjoyed it and found her quite inspiring. Go Girl. Her daughter Lauren was there but not Matt Newtown, who may want to associate with her and try and improve his own self image after the ‘battering’ it has taken. All puns intended.
Patti took out top honours. Michael Klim and Elka Graham were the bottom two which just shows that talent in the water does not translate to dry land.