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Dancing With the Stars – Bollywood night

Tonight on Dancing With The Stars was Bollywood night. Channel 7 had been promoting it big all week, concluding with a huge coloured picture of Anh Do and Luda in today’s Daily Telegraph wearing Indian clothes.

Darryl opened the show wearing his suit, clearly he was not going to get in an Indian maharajah outfit. He did his usual dull opening patter. If someone can explain to me the joke “we need a fast show because of climate change” I’ll send a Kevin Rudd chocolate in the mail. Or you can vote twice in this weeks poll whichever you prefer.

Then Sonia Kruger entered in a silver Carla Zampatti dress which was meant to be sariesque and she had a bindi on forehead. After a quick bollywood type dance they chatted and of course did the usual Myer plug.

Ok I thought bring on Bollywood night. Then nothing – it was the foxtrot, pase doble, and waltz. Where was the melodramatic indian dancing to cheesy songs. Was Bollywood night just eating curries in the green room? At one stage after the Tango I would have been happy to have had Tania Zaetta (our very own Aussie Bollywood star) as guest judge.

Then we had the special guest dancers – were they going to be an indian dance troupe??? No it was four kids from the musical Billy Elliott who Darryl patronised both verbally and physically. Still no Bollywood.

Then finally at the 11th hour we had the number we had been waiting for a Bollywood number. A three minute dance number by all the remaining contestants which would take up 50% of their score this week. That was Bollywood night. I think Channel 7 have redefined the term anti-climatic (that was not a climate change joke Darryl.)

I cannot wait for hip-hop night where Darryl will wear his suit with a baseball cap, Sonia will wear pants with her underpants sticking out, and then the contestants will dance the samba, salsa, and pride of erin.

Anyway back to the show.

James Courtney and Olya were first out with the Foxtrot. After last weeks poor routine due to lack of practise they needed to come up with a winner.

Alas there was poor acting at the beginning combined with a boring one paced dance. James, who I normally think is great looked gawky. Judges agreed and gave it 20.

Mark Beretta and Linda danced the Rumba. I thought it was their best routine yet. Mark did not do much but stand their and make poses, but it worked for me there did seem to be some passion or intensity between the two.

The judges all complained about the technique. Apparently the Rumba has a lot of hip action. I don’t think the people at home care about technique we just want to be entertained. So it technically wasn’t a rumba big deal. He was given 24.

This show really needs to cut the judges down. Everyone of them when critiquing Mark’s routine said the same thing. It drags to show out too much.

Sandro and Patti danced the Pase doble – they were clearly shaken by being in the bottom two. Behind the I’m just a sweet old lady act is a very competitive person. They admit to actively campaigning for people to vote for them.

Sandro was wearing the bolero jacket sans shirt. Is it illegal for men to have chest hair on this program. Mark Beretta was not sporting any nor was Sandro. Again if anyone can spot a chest hair before the end of the series a Kevin Rudd choc will be sent their way.

Judges loved their routine, because Patti showed a different side to her ie. she did not smile therefore she was being intense and gave her a high 32.

Bridie and Craig were up next with the waltz. A boring dance for a boring couple. They danced it well, however at times she was so stiff it looked like he was dancing with a blow up doll.

Judges of course gushed at their favourite and gave her a 33. It will be tough to get her knocked out with her high scores.

It was interesting to see Sonia having to be prompted to the ad break, and to think I thought she did all her own lines.

Anh Do and Luda did the jive. Anh Do played Jeff, the purple one from The Wiggles, it was a lot of fun them jiving to the perennial kids favourite “Hot Potatoe, Hot Potatoe“.

Judges were not as enthusiastic and gave them a low 25.

David Hobson and Corrine danced the tango. Apparently David has been very sick all week, and he could barely talk. I thought it was pretty good and dramatic. He is a bit of a dark horse to win. However his trying to show ‘personality’ all the time gets a bit irritating. I was glad he could not talk this evening. Lets face it Darryl does enough talking for all of them.

Then the final number the Bollywood piece. We had the 2 min intro from Darryl who painstakingly explained what Bollywood was. Hello Daz your audience is not a sheltered workshop..

Then it was on. Well it was very difficult to tell who was what but it did look like fun and made me laugh.

Todd McKenny thought it was like watching SBS “he saw India….a white India”. Isn’t that what SBS viewers like – their multiculturism dished up in an anglo way. Are there any non anglo saxons (second generations don’t apply they have been anglocised) that actually watch SBS? Again a Rudd chocolate to anyone who can identify a viewer whose english is a second language.

The judges scored them and then it was onto the elimination. After James and Olya’s poor performance last week (when they attract the votes) to this weeks lacklustre one it was always going to be difficult for them to stay alive in the comp. Though have to say I was a bit disappointed, as he was great value, both nice personality, and a bit of rhythm. Olya was just a gorgeous russian firecracker, I hope she is back next series. Yes that will be the season with Candice Falzon, a Tozzi, and Ben Cousins as part of his drug rehab process. Can it get any better then that?