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Farmer Wants a Wife -Episode 4

Channel 9 is now promoting the show as the “romantic new series” clearly the marketing team have been eating Bindeez again.

The story so far, the six farmers had whittled down their selected women down to two, and they were staying on the farm to get to know them better, and try out farming life.

Chris 34 farmer from Tamworth picked Kim, a disability support worker, and Jocelyn a lawyer from Sydney.

Kim and Chris were hitting it off, until she had to go back to Sydney for the weekend for a wedding.

So he then he had to give some attention to his other woman Jocelyn. Jocelyn states she is 34, but I think she looks older then that, unless that Thai plastic surgery holiday went horribly wrong. She appears to have a bit of silicone in her, as well collagen lips.

However during his time alone with her he showed why he had been single for so long. This guy is a personality retard and immature. He barely spoke to her over lunch and appeared to be sulking the whole time until Kim came back.

Chris it is just good manners to make a guest in your home feel welcome, he could not manage that. He needs to grow up.

Jocelyn at least had the maturity to bring up the issue whilst they were horseriding. You deserve better then that love pack up your bags and go.

Chris met Kim at the airport with a dopey grin and “I missed you more then I thought I would” they kissed and hugged and she was happy. It was nauseating but it looks like this pair may have matched up.

Brad the spiritual farmer from Swan Hill had asked Mel and Jane to the farm. Last week he had dropped a ‘bombshell’ by saying he had met another women prior to the filming of the show, which prompted a meltdown by Mel.

However this week it was Jane’s turn. Last week her and Brad had shared a short kissed, which she interpreted as the next step. He clearly did not think so. If she had slept with him she would have thought that meant marriage!

He went away for the weekend to wedding, on his return he told Mel that it was only interested in two girls now, Mel and the mystery girl.

Jane was then told the bad news which brought a pretty weird reaction “I only looked at your picture on the website and noone elses and where has it gotten me” ” I trusted you and Mel”. It was all a bit strange but then what is appropriate behaviour when being dumped on national TV. Would June Dally-Watkins care to comment?

Did she think Mel should have stepped back to give her open slather to him? She should count her lucky stars he did not like her, as I think he is a weirdo. Which makes him perfect for the slightly unhinged Mel. Mel should have a free run after all as the other anon girl will be dumping Brad after seeing how is portrayed on this series.

Craig the 27 year old dinky-di farmer from West Wyalong had selected Erin, a 24 year old billing officer and single mum, and Deanne a 25 year old medical receptionist. Now last week I advocated these girls should run and run fast, however they were still there mooning over this mummy’s boy farmer.

He took the girls to watch him play rugby and lo and behold mummy is there on a picnic rug. She would be the mother-in-law from hell. He then proceeds to get into a punchup – which unsurprisingly the girls loved. Erin likes a bit of rough apparently. Great role model for your 2 years son love.

Deanna had a meltdown as she thought Craig preferred Erin over her. She said “I love his family, and I love his friends”. Someone needs to stage an intervention on this girl and fast. Craig then took her on a “date” up the paddock with a thermos.

She continued with some classic lines from Mills & Boon novels – “I have been craving to spend time with you”. Well it worked as next minute they were pashing. It was gross – she really needed to remember her family will be watching this.

Then he took Erin on a paddock date, hopefully to a different paddock. This guy also showed his immaturity by sulkily saying “I have spoken to my mates and they have told me I will always come second to your son.” Kudos to her for saying “Yes you will”. He looked shocked that she was actually truthful.

Insensitively he went in for the pash which she really did not want.

I would like to know whether it was his friends saying that or is mum. Erin is a pretty straight talker so maybe she may be good for him. I just don’t see her putting up with him in the long term, as it will mean she will have to children her son and him.

Her kid arrives next week so it will be interesting how Craig copes with that.

Jon the 28 year old from Deniliquin picked Jodie and Meika both nurses. Now this guy really wants to get married.

He took them both to the races where he clearly favoured Jodie, though Meika as a consolation prize managed to win on the punt.

Jodie was starting to realise that country life was not quite as romantic as she thought. Jon’s farm is 40 km out of town. As she said what happens if you run out of milk? Buy a dairy cow, and you will always have super fresh milk to drink or buy UHT. I would have thought the bigger issue was finding decent coffee, limited movie offerings, and no sushi train.

Jon decided to tackle the bull by the horns, and put Jodie on the spot about her attentions, and after admitting she just wanted friendship he suggest that both Meika, and her leave.

Jodie’s feelings appeared to be deeper then warranted as she was crying. However Jon was on that phone ringing another girl from his top five asking her to come and stay.

At first I thought he was being a bit heartless, however I tend to agree with what he has done, why have someone there you like more and more, if they don’t want you. Cut the cord and move along. Maybe his bedtime reading has been “He Is Really Not That Into You”.

Next week we see who the lucky girl is.

Next up was Gus 32 year old from Warren who picked Julie and Brooke to be his farm companions. Nothing must be going on here, as we barely got to see them last week, and this week there was hardly much more footage.

Maybe they have been hit with the boring stick.

He took Julie on a date to the local pub and then called her Brooke so that date was a disaster.

He then went horse riding with Brooke his preferred choice – however she is vegetarian. His big issue was if they had kids whether they would be brought up meat eaters. She acquiesced to this demand.

Lastly was the laconic Drew a 32 farmer from Mudgee who picked Tash and Susie as his two girls. These are my favourite.

He is in a dilemma as he likes them both. Maybe he needs to suggest a Jack Thompson type living situation. Jack notoriously lived as part of a ménage à trois with current wife Leona King and her sister Bunkie for years.His statement about the arrangement is as follows – “I wouldn’t have missed it for quids.”

Somehow I don’t think they will agree to this. However as he stated “The everyman fantasy of two women has now been killed for him”.

He took Susie fishing, with a bottle of wine. This guy must be singlehandedly propping up the Mudgee wine industry.

She revealed she had not had a serious boyfriend before as she had not liked any of them, however she did like him.

Not much on Tash this week except for a quick glimpse on her on a quad bike, as was Susie, who managed to flash more of her g-string then she would have liked.

Things we have learnt from this weeks episode:
1. When a guy kisses you there is no hidden meaning it is just a kiss.
2. There appeared to be no water shortage in Warren, as Gus and the girls hosed down his tractor.
3. Natalie G compere uniform continues to be jeans, checked shirt, and big belt buckle. Channel 9’s interpretation on how farm girls dress.

Onadrought one of this blogs regular respondents has been missing for the past few weeks. I wonder as she is a big reality tv fan, that maybe she is one of the contestants on the show?. If that is the case I hope she is in Mudgee with Drew as I know she likes a good drop of wine!


1 poohbah { 11.15.07 at 11:40 am }

i think that if the tv station was seriously concerned about helping out farmers with romance, it would have a gay version. Imagine being on a farm in Warren as a gay fella or girlie. That would really test all the mother-in-laws from hell!

2 disco queen { 11.15.07 at 11:40 am }

maybe natalie’s father could be on it!

3 bored { 11.15.07 at 11:41 am }

i must be really bored at work today…

4 Reality Raver { 11.15.07 at 10:11 pm }


Maybe they can follow up with a gay version.

It might mean all those drag queens who turn up at the Sydney auditions for Australian Idol, and So You Think You Can Dance.

Disco Queen – Natalie’s father would definately be a contender, but I reckon Jacob Butler would turn just for another shot at stardom.

Bored – Um yes.