Survivor One World – Commences On May 15 At 10.00pm
Well after a few false starts Survivor One World will finally commence on NINE on Tuesday May 15 . This has been the second time NINE have announced the start of the series as it was meant to begin two weeks ago.
In the US the show is nearing the finale so NINE have been a bit slow off the mark much to the anger of hard core Survivor fans.
The tribes of a total of 18 contestants are divided into men versus women, will have to decide whether to share their resources with each other, or leave the opposing tribe to fend for themselves.
The two tribes are Salani Tribe and the Manono Tribe, named after islands in Samoa.
Salani Tribe (Women)
Nina Acosta, 51, Clovis, Calif., retired LAPD officer
Christina Cha, 29, West Hollywood, Calif., career consultant
Monica Culpepper, 41, Tampa, ex-NFL player’s wife
Kat Edorsson, 22, Orlando, timeshare rep
Chelsea Meissner, 26, Charleston, S.C., medical sales
Kourtney Moon, 29, Austin, Texas, motorcycle repair
Alicia Rosa, 25, Chicago, special ed teacher
Kim Spradlin, 29, San Antonio, bridal shop owner
Sabrina Thompson, 33, Brooklyn, high school teacher
Manono Tribe (Men)
Jay Byars, 25, Gaffney, S.C., model
Colton Cumbie, 21, Monroeville, Ala., college student
Michael Jefferson, 30, Seattle, banker
Leif Manson, 27, San Diego, phlebotomist
Jonas Otsuji, 37, Lehi, Utah, sushi chef
Bill Posley, 28, Venice, Calif., stand-up comedian
Matt Quinlan, 33, San Francisco, attorney
Troy Robertson, 50, Miami, swimsuit photographer
Greg Smith, 64, Houston, plastic surgeon
SURVIVOR: ONE WORLD – PREMIERES TUESDAY, MAY 15, AT 10.00PM ON NINE
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64 comments
My TV mag doesn’t have it listed ….. hope its not a bloody hoax!
Susan – here’s a link to details.
http://www.tvtonight.com.au/2012/05/airdate-survivor-one-world.html
Thanks Georgie – saw an ad – so it must be true!
I’m really looking forward to something with a bit of tension and a few strong personalities. Apart from MKR, this year has been pretty ho-hum so far.
For sure Georgie, like a good old kooky Phil or a nut-job like Beandon, heh even a crazy like Susan ……. this show is my guiltiest reality pleasure – can’t wait!!!!!!!!!!!!!
No need to feel guilty about being a fan of Survivor! Can’t wait to converge on this site again next week! Can’t wait to see what all the rage on the internet is about Colton. I’ve said it before, nothing brings Christian fundamentalists and liberal homosexuals together in America than an openly villainous gay Republican on a reality tv show. Bring on the season!
Oh JStar you have me positively fanging for it now!
Interesting news, but I won’t be watching. Have been using the wonders of the world wide web to watch online.
The real finale is on Monday on Channel Bit-Torrent
Must confess for the first time ever I was tempted to download…
Hell yes JStar Colton sounds like he is going to be a cracker.
Yes looking forward to the chat next week all of you! I have resisted looking on line. I agree Georgie, looking forward to some strong personalities.
Well, certainly enjoyed that and got my Survivor fix.
No-one stands out just yet to me and I love the way the producers let ya see into most of the contestants personalities within the first 2 episodes – MChef could learn something from that!!
Really liked Monica – she comes across as quite ballsy – not really an American football follower but wonder if I have heard of her husband?
There are two girls – I think Chelsea and Kim – who are just spectacularly stunning – they seem to have some alliance with each other going.
Not sure if I would choose my alliance within the first 10 minutes – as Jeff asked in tribal, they all seem to regret it.
Colton was portrayed pretty well – I think I would get pi$$ed off too if he were over at my camp all the time – hope he gets to use the Idol and blindside one of the dude’s – god, this lot of jocks are so far up themselves, esp that attorney Matt.
Roll on next week – and hope it another double ep …………
Yes, sorry for the delay Susan. Coach was over at my place and insisted on doing a marathon praying session. Seriously Benjamin, let it go. You are so last season (and Season 20 and Season 18). Given that this season was deliberately held back by Channel 9, we now have a glut of reality tv shows with so little time to watch. I’ve got my Cochran hat out and put on my sweater vest to break down these episodes.
As you know, this year Survivor 24 (Island of Cooties) have a boys vs girls twist. In line with the fake merge in Season 5 Thailand, both tribes will be living on the same beach. Once again, Jeff Probst is re-animated from his cryogenic sleep, have his dimples massaged back in, before introducing us to this year’s 18 castaways.
Survivor casting have certain archetypes. This year’s Ken Doll goes to Matt for his abs and for his insight that his frat-boy alliance of four was the controlling majority in his tribe of 9. Model, Jay, is this year’s David Beckham. Pleasant on the eye (right RR?) but he should not be encouraged to speak. Greg (me Tarzan, you Troyzan), may be this year’s eccentric old person following such illustrious past contestants like Shambo (she who gets spoken to by God during visions of escaped chickens) and Philip (Special Agent of the Fuschia Underpants Brigade). Leif, the little person and clearly the odd man out in the tribe, at least aesthetically. And finally Colton, the token gay. Colton is so effeminate that he makes Brandon (from Survivor Africa) seem macho and we all remember how Brandon shot that bow and arrow!
On the women’s side, Chelsea is this season’s Barbie. Every year, there is at least one pharmaceutical sales rep contestant who just happens to bring two good reasons why we should continue watching this show. Chelsea, you had me at chicken catching. Monica is this season’s cougar/milf and she impressed me with her plan to steal fire from the guys whilst they slept. Plus she also brings coconuts to the table. Courtney is this season’s odd woman out (thanks Jeff for making her a target for an easy boot by calling her out at the beginning). And finally, the catty sisters goes to Alicia and Christina with Christina having to yell at Alicia to shut-up at tribal council so that she could explain her side of the story regarding weaver-gate. Even Jeff was left speechless at the fighting between those two, three days into the game! In fact, Alicia was just obnoxious during this entire episode, even muttering she would punch Christina’s face twice. By the way, Alicia is a teacher. But then again, so was Na’onka!
Mark Burnett loves to hide clues during the first couple of episodes about who the winner may be and how the season will pan out. Think back all the way to Season 1 when Richard Hatch crowed in the first episode that he will it all. Definitely in the first episode, we saw how the men were prepared to play the game and be “ruthless.” Michael (he of the square jaw and abs) made the brilliant move to steal the axe and other items that the women collected from the truck at the start of the game. Then the men announced they would take the immunity, sending the women to Tribal Council. Seriously ladies, why are you complaining that things have to be fair? It is a game for $1 million. We got a look at how arrogant and gung-ho the frat boy alliance was – believing they are controlling both their tribe and the game. In fact, all of the men, particularly Troyzan, seemed quite dismissive of the women’s chances. The first episode didn’t actually dispel that for me. The women were quite dysfunctional. No clear direction in trying to get fire from the guys. Only one major highlight was Sabrina finding the immunity idol and giving it to Colton to take down one of the frat-boys. At this early stage, Sabrina and Chelsea stand out as two who could go far for the women: Sabrina openly strategising with Colton to take down an immunity threat when the game becomes an individual one, and Chelsea refusing to budge and continue using the chickens as a bargaining tool. (By the way, are these the same chickens that Shambo lost? They are filming in Samoa again).
Not sure what the fuss is about Colton thus far. He realised he did not fit into the men’s tribe so he played towards his strength which was to girly things up with the girls. It worked. He got the immunity idol from Sabrina and the best quip of the night – “I would slit his (Matt’s) throat quicker than Taylor Swift could write another song about an ex-boyfriend.”
Courtney becomes the first woman in Survivor history to be medically evacuated from the game when she broke her wrist, thus sparing the women from voting out one of their own (probably would have been Christina). Courtney (and Nina with her face plant) only has herself to blame. This is despite Jeff repeatedly telling the contestants to jump with their hands on their chest.
Episode 2 comes along and Sabrina being the savvy, calm individual she is, calls a meeting. She is elected leader and she emphasise the obvious – communication. Taking this as a cue, Kat assumes only she can talk during this episode. Kat is a young Gen Y who has left her bottle of Ritalin behind. She just can’t shut-up.
The guys win the reward challenge for a tarp. I hate these do-it-yourself challenges when Jeff doesn’t show up. Mr Dimples need to be there to needle the contestants. The thing that really made me sit up was Sabrina’s comment after losing the challenge. She said that “nobody remembers who came second.” Potential spoiler Mark Burnett. Sabrina’s fate is tied with the number 2. She could potentially be runner-up, voted out second, second member of the jury, or second last member of the jury.
A few more storyline nuggets have emerged. Colton was having an emotional meltdown. Given that he had the immunity idol, it probably wasn’t a surprise that he refused to help out at camp. The rest of the guys (including Tarzan assaulting my eyes in his skimpy blue briefs) helped reinforce their shelter with the newly acquired tarp whilst Colton sat idly by. A queen needs her servants even in a rainforest setting. He then went over to the girl’s tribe and had a teary moment about not fitting in. Sick of his constant pestering, Kim and Sabrina tell him to go back to his tribe. Clarity comes to those who face adversity without mascara as Colton finally realised he had all this power and he was prepared to strategise. First step, was to ensure that there will not be any proper eye candy for the females watching at home. He showed his idol to the other “misfits” (Tarzan, Troyzan, Leif, and nice-guy Jonas) but did not let on that his game plan was to side with the girls post-merge. I guess it is goodbye to Penis Balance for this season if Colton gets his way!
Immunity challenge time comes and it involves the contestants using their balancing skills. Historically in a boys vs girls season (Amazon, Vanuatu), the men have sucked in these kind of challenges. Not this time. The men kick butt. The women were horrible, particularly Kat who kept on jumping in the water even when she didn’t have to. Realising the error of her ways, she apologises for her sucky performance by farting on Alicia. Classy.
Nina, the retired cop, realised she was on the chopping block and boy did she scramble. She worked over Chelsea big time. However, Monica was quite insightful in realising that she wasn’t in a good enough position to aggressively lobby Chelsea, Kim, and Sabrina without having the target turn towards her.
Still, Nina went down fighting at Tribal Council – throwing Kat under the bus and calling out the majority alliance. This is where Dimples is in his element. He loves to niggle for clues at Tribal Council. Both Chelsea and Sabrina admitted they would have chosen different people to be in their alliance, now that they know the girls better. Kat called out Christina at Tribal but after the heated exchange last time, Christina wasn’t going to bite and give people a reason to vote her out. Nina was overwhelmingly sent home.
So yes, a fairly insightful two episodes regarding personalities but beyond Christina and Alicia yelling at each other at the first tribal council, there weren’t any real fireworks. May be worth keeping an eye on Kim though. Unlike Sabrina who is more forthright in saying things to people, Kim has this under-the-radar and non-threatening way of speaking to people to get them to do what she wants. Cue how she politely, but firmly, she told Colton to go back to his tribe as well as to get Chelsea to continue voting with the alliance. May be one to watch.
JStar – Great recap – Love it.
Thanks RR. Will hopefully comment on episodes 3 and 4 a lot more quickly. What went down in that second tribal council was gob smackingly offensive.
So glad Survivor has statred at last, its about time. When will Channel nine realise its a popular show and stop putting it on so late! I’d much rather watch this than The Block or The Voice, its much more interesting! Last night I taped it as it was on so late so I still have to watch it to comment on eps 3 and 4.
Heh JStar – fabo insight – thanks
Will certainly be looking out for some hidden clues …..
Yippee – another double episode last night on record – cant wait!
Just watched episodes 4 and 5. Don’t know what to make of Colton now. he seemed nice at first but he has a real nasty, bitchy streak and somehow is becoming very powerful in getting others to do what he says. He acts childish when he says he won’t talk to anyone he doesn’t like and its a lame excuse not to like Bill because he’s a stand up comedian ! It was weird what happened in tribal council, how did he convince the guys to swap with the girls? I guess he’s clever in a nasty way.
AKA Susan – the 1st one!
Heh Andrea as we are only up to Ep 3-4 and have waited SO long for this show, could I ask that you put the SPOILER tag at the top of your comment please……………..
Sorry, didn’t mean to, I thought everyone had watched it from Tuesday night. Iv’e been waiting for RR to put up a blog so that she can recap the episodes from Tues night but it hasn’t happened yet and its Thursday now. if you check the Masterchef recap from today you will see that other people are also wanting a recap. Sorry once again. I would never intentionally spoil things, I’m glad I didn’t say who was voted off, PHEW!
No probs at all Andrea – its just Ep 3-4 were only this Tues – are you downloading eps so you up to 4-5?
No I was just commenting on the double episode that was on on Tues 22nd which was 3 and 4 together. I don’t know how to download eps early, I just watch them each tuesday at ten pm. I hope RR puts a blog up soon though. I made a mistake saying 5 so I’ve only seen 1 to 4 like you and thats what I was commenting on in regards to Colton and tribal council, it was so good!
RR, you were whinging on here about Ch 9 not airing Survivor One World and even suggested a hunger strike to get things moving.
After 2 exciting shows still no Survivor blog on here but instead it’s all about the boring Masterchef episodes or irrelevant gossip (e.g. Mary Murphy).
Any chance of lifting your game?
Heh mate – did ya maybe think RR might have a bit on her plate with the amount of Reality tv shows on – give her a break – we got this thread – so chat away all ya like – love to hear your thoughts!
Agree with you Andrea. Wish channel 9 didn’t put this on too late (same goes for #7 and the amazing race).
Wow wee – Colton really not what I expected heh – I would think they would all keep him onside until the end and then watch him implode – it will be wonderful – I really didint think people like him still existed….. I live such a sheltered life!
Wacky move indeed changing up tribal council – girls shouldnt look a gift horse in the mouth!
How bad were they at the last challenge – Alicia certainly digging herself a grave – would have been interesting to see what would have happened at their tribal council.
Really not liking Salani’s attempts to gain fire, sleep under shelter, trade off their boat etc, its embarrasing as a woman to watch – hopefully though it is all for a purpose and they thinking about life after the merge – well, I would be………
So happy to see the back of that chauvinist Matt – hasn’t he watched enough to know that pompus, loud mouth jocks just dont go far?
Hoping they keep up the double episodes but would prefer user friendly earlier start but heh, thank god for HD tuner recording device thingamajigs!
Sioux, what ‘amount of reality TV shows’ are you talking about?
RR is only blogging on Masterchef and some other irrelevant nonsense so that doesn’t look like too much of a burden.
She must have a lot on her plate outside the RR business but at least she could manage our expectations.
I agree Russel Not Happy, how much longer do we have to wait? There’s really not all that much blogging going on apart from Masterchef.
Thanks Andrea, let’s wait for a response from RR (hopefully before the Survivor season ends).
Heh guys couldnt agree more – s’pose I was just defending RR as she does provide a pretty good forum for us all to comment – I would love a weekly Survivor post too …… but as I said before I s’pose we could all discuss here our thoughts……
Roll on Tuesday!
I agree roll on Tuesday! I am totally enjoying this season. I saw on the Today Tonight website that it was a crazy tribal council and we were going to see something even spunky Jeff hasn’t seen… so I was watching eagerly the 2 eps on Tues night! Why oh why would u nominate yourselves to go to Tribal just to get rid of annoying comedian? Why wouldn’t u wait, stay a stronger tribe and worry about Tribal when u next lose and then vote Billy off then??
And why is everyone so scared of Colton? They were so quick to go, oh yeah no worries, we’ll go to Tribal, sounds good. What the??
And as for the girls, why would u make an alliance in the first 10 mins of the game?? And then u realise you’ve aligned yourself with a bunch of nitwits.
And totally agree Sioux Denim, how awful was Matt the pig. So glad he’s gone.
And thank you JStar/Cochrane for your great insight, and thanks for the chuckle with reference to Shambo and her chickens!
And once again I’m shocked by the stupid outfits they all roll up in!
And at Russell Not Happy… why on earth would you need RR to recap when no-one on earth could do a better job than what JStar did above for eps 1 & 2… so we just need to wait for his take on ep 3 & 4 now
Izobel2, I’d be happy for Jstar to comment on episodes 3 and 4 if RR didn’t have time to do it but we are still waiting for either of them to do it so come on please guys! I don’t know why they all do whatever Colton wants either, he is very childish in getting his own way, I felt a bit sorry for Bill actually, all he did wrong apparently was to be a stand up comedian! Colton is a bit like evil Russell!
I read somewhere a while ago Izobel that they are told what to wear on their first day – weird, I know!
I imagine as much as we cant stand Colton he will be around for a while as he would be one to take to final 3, I cant think too mny would vote for him in the end – except maybe that Tarzan fool who seems to just follow Colton’s lead………
Izobel, I agree on a great contribution from JStar.
My point is that ‘Australia’s leading Reality TV blog’ only has blogs on Masterchef and occasionally one of The Block.
RR seemed very excited about the new Survivor season before it started but since it started she is missing in action.
Survivor only airs 1x per week so surely she should find some time to write something about it.
This whole Master Chef obsession (not even the highest rating reality TV show) is a bit over the top.
Russell not happy- I agree. If RR wants to be/remain reality TV’s leading blog- she has to actually blog on the shows, not just a couple that apparently take her fancy.
and if her time is restricted for whatever reason- maybe stick to shows that are actually on, not blogs about possible future shows or shows/gossip from/on overseas!
and some balance please- less of Masterchef and more on some of the other shows- AGT, DWTS, Block, Survivor to name just a few that are “MIA”…
I agree with everyone, its really frustrating to still be waiting for Survivor recaps. I enjoy the Masterchef recaps and I think RR does concentrate on this a lot because it always attracts the most comments, as did Celebrity Apprentice and The Biggest Loser, but even these were not always recapped constantly.There must be a problem which we are not being told about, remember not so long ago she hired Anthony the intern to help her. Could he not be given certain other shows to recap to please everyone as we all have our favourite shows? I agree there’s no point blogging on future shows or random people such as The Drunk Punters or Mary Murphy as they attract little or no comments, so RR needs to save her time and concentrate on shows people want. We don’t hear about The Bachelor either and she was very keen on that at the beginning and its the final next week! I hope when Big Brother starts there is regular blogging on that.Its a bit sad that we are using this thread from 15th May just to make our comments known isn’t it? I’m sorry to critize RR but she needs to listen to us please. Jstar would be a good help by taking over Survivor recaps. Thank You.
Russell Not Happy, Andrea and Sue N – Unfortunately I don’t have super powers, I need to eat, sleep, be a mother, partner and friend. Also I need to pay a mortgage, pay bills and eat. I don’t have a trust fund nor a sugar daddy (Donald Trump need not apply as he only gives his wives 1 million in pre-nup apparently).
Or if any of you have a business and wish to advertise on my blog feel free to contact me.
The Mary Murphy, coke fuelled nympho story is much quicker to write then a recap. By the way thought it was a cracker. And yes I do concentrate on Masterchef when it is on as it attracts a lot of comments. Yes I want to please my readers, but as it appears I cannot please everyone all the time. However Sue N I would welcome your recap on DWTS tonight, Not Happy Russell would you like to recap Survivor on Tuesday night. And Andrea would you like to write your story on the just finished season of The Bachelor? I am serious.
There you go, there’s an offer too good to refuse sueN (DWTS) – I’d love to comment about DWTS……….. and Not Happy Russell and Andrea – go for it, it would keep the blogging going (totally understand RR has a young family) – Anthony (intern) obviously didn’t work out……….. so its a great invite from RR
(especially on weekends as sueN pointed out earlier – nothing happening on here on weekends and there are some of us that still check in on Saturdays and Sundays)
Daze – Anthony is still around I just need to send him some work to do…. he is a student so he needs to prioritise that. BTW trying to write a blog post now.
Daze – Also got distracted by a debate on twitter on whether Channel NINE should still be taking Grant Hackett as a commentator to the Olympics. This is related to the front page of the Sunday Tele/Herald Sun. And of course not at all reality related.
For me, I don’t care about Grant Hackett, Lara BingBong, Screaming Mary (SYTYCD) or Kardashians or John Travolta’s sexuality – don’t know half the time why this makes front page coverage – same as witch fight between Liz Hurley and Simone (ex of Shane Warne)………….. I love reality, I love posting on here and I love my hub of shows; The Voice, DWTS, TBL, MC, MKR and AGT (maybe XFactor) of which no-one would have the time to recap on so many shows let alone Amazing Race, The Block, etc. So yes, Id love one of the regulars to recap so we can goss about AGT, DWTS etc – you’ve kindly put out the offer, so I hope someone takes it up – the weekends are void of much activity on here and Im with sueN, littlepetal etc – let’s keep this active on Saturdays and Sundays too -
RR et al- have considered it (blogging), but due to a serious (& permanent) neck injury and also a brain injury- unable to type large amounts in a timely manner. also unable to multi-task well since injury- so watching/recapping not a doable thing for me.
I do understand about time constraints (as explained to me previously) however, seeing drivel about Murphy etc got my goat, seeing as so many shows are not being blogged.
If RR cannot do this any more- I get it, but please let us know- as you now have. I guess I have now had it confirmed that I need to look elsewhere for my recaps. I do not always watch every/all of some of these shows (due to injuries)- hence my search for recaps/blogs…
sorry if I upset/offended anyone- but I was (am) frustrated by the change in the level/amount of blogs on reality ravings these days…. I had thought RR was doing this a a business of sorts, but perhaps not??
& you have no idea how much proof reading/edit was required just to type this!
……my 10c worth…
I expect hell will freeze over before the whingers stump up a recap.
BDD- I believe I have explained my situation…
We are not whingers, BDD, just loyal followers of these blogs by RR, so we are just trying to understand what’s happening. Totally understand if RR doesn’t have time, Jstar had an excellent recap of Survivor, so looking forward to more from he or she. I am not a journalist, that’s why I come to this site to add my comments along with everyone else, I thought that was the whole idea. Someone has to put the thread up first like RR has just done with the new Nicole Ritchie story, before others can comment. I don’t know how to do that so I go to someone in the business like Reality Ravings to read the threads and then comment on the ones I like.
Hi Guys. Sorry, for the delay again. It took me a while to pick my jaw off the floor after the stuff that was said in the second tribal council. Plus, am busy writing my 10,000 word thesis on why Channel 9 sucks big time by airing this show so late at night and so far behind the original airing schedule in the USA! Anyway, shout outs to Izobel2, Andrea, and TCFKAS (The Contributor Formerly Known As Susan) for their patience. Okay. Sweater vest on? Check. Let’s rumble!
It’s Night 5 as Episode 3 commences for Survivor 24 (Island of Cooties). The Salani women tribe trudge back from an emotional council after voting out Nina for being old and useless and keeping Kat around for being young and useless. Oh wait. That’s a lie. Kat was also kept around because her role in the tribe was to tend the fire. That involves using her inbuilt methane igniter so that instantaneous fire can be started at camp. Despite huddling around the same fire that Kat’s butt started, Chelsea mutters that she and Kim are thinking about getting rid of their weaker (read “Kat”) members of their alliance if they don’t start winning soon. The women just need that spark (no Kat, not THAT spark). Chelsea means that glimmer of hope, that the women can latch on so they can win challenges. Well after the pathetic displays in the first two episodes, Helen Reddy called and said she has disowned the Salani tribe.
Colton and Jonas come around and warn the girls that a storm is coming and that they can come over to their tarp-proof camp to entertain the boys by playing dress-up in their nurses outfits and hitting each other with feather-downed pillows. Or something like that. Chelsea and Colton’s southern accents are quite hard to understand at times so I can only assume that was what was suggested. Cue torrential range montage and miserable looks on the women as we head into that brief intro.
Well, looks like it poured overnight in Samoa. Filming during wet season, go figure! A night of misery clarifies to Kim and Chelsea that pride is indeed a sin. All the women trudge over to the men’s tribe with the intention of asking to use their fire to warm themselves but somehow forgot their manners at the same time. Ladies, a little “please” wouldn’t go astray. The men acquiesce (Fools! What happened to cut-throat Mike who stole the axe during the first 90 seconds of this game from the women?).
Reward time during the pouring rain. It’s a memory game. Dimples says that they are playing for a canoe, fishing gear, and momentum. Excuse me? Spoiler alert! Wasn’t Chelsea saying something at the start about needing that spark to latch on? No surprise then that the women win in a blow-out – 5-zip. Three interesting things worth noting about this challenge. Firstly, the women were evil in distracting the men with their fripples so that they were rendered into a bubbling mess of Neanderthalness. Secondly, Colton runs even more gay than any stereotype a Priscilla Musical can conjure up. Thirdly, despite being one of the dumbest on the tribe, Kat still somehow manages to beat Troyzan after seven tries at one memory puzzle. Guess she isn’t the dumbest person on the island.
Back at camp, the men walk around shirtless in the pouring rain – thus complying with the mandatory gratuitous sexy images for the women and gay viewers at home. The women celebrate their first win by trying to start fire in their camp but their coconut husks are too wet and baked beans are not a staple on this island for Kat. Given that it was Cougar Monica’s job to keep her coconuts dry
she walks over to the men’s camp to take fire. That’s right, no “please” from her – shame on you Cougar Mommy! Jay (the good-looking model with the body of a greek god and the voice of a ladyboy) plays it nice and hands over an ember to the women. This wasn’t enough because minutes later, a shivering Chelsea and Alicia roll up and stand around the men’s fire. At this time, the men ask if they could use the women’s canoe and fishing gear from time to time which immediately elicits indignation from Alicia. The men try to explain that if the women are going to take things or borrow things from the men, it should be a fair exchange. If the men were at the the first tribal council, they would have known that when Alicia talks, no one else can interrupt her. She tells them that she can’t talk for her tribe (as she is too busy talking herself) so all the men can just talk to her hand as she hogs the fire. So Tarzan steps in and send the women away to find out their consensus with the concept of fair exchange. Chelsea goes back to the women’s tribe and cries as she is cold and thinking of quitting. [Um, Chelsea, in the history of Survivor, more women have quit than men. Last shameful episode was when Na’onka and Purple Kelly quit with 11 days to go despite being in the majority allicance. Just putting it out there!] Thankfully, Barbie doesn’t quit and further shame women in general. That is until Cougar Mommy states as a fact that “they are women and they just aren’t built to endure such harshness.” Beyonce called Monica. Don’t even think of showing your face at her upcoming concert now!
Day 8 rolls around as nothing of substance happened on Day 7 that was worth showing. The sun is out and the women scantily tease Crazy Brandon Hantz (who is watching at home) in their skimpy bikinis as they swim underwater whilst fishing. Take that Brandon. Dare you to have impure thoughts tonight! Kim makes a point about how the women are slowly finding their feet in this game. Hmm…in case the viewers at home haven’t got all the very unsubtle clues, me think the women are finally going to win immunity.
Immunity challenge right on cue and it involves blindfolded team-mates getting puzzle pieces through obstacle courses. Oh, oh. Communication challenge? The Salani team proves viewers at home right once again by sucking at this half of the challenge. The men have this huge lead. All Bill has to do is assemble the ten pieces together. Talk about snatching defeat from the jaws of victory. Sabrina manages to steal the win for the women and they shriek with joy. The men trudge back to camp deflated except for Bill who whoops and jumps around excited to discover that smoking coconut husks have the same hallucinogenic properties as LSD. So who to vote out? Well, every tribe needs a strong Queen and after his emotional meltdown last episode, Colton has emerged as the true leader.
He gathers his misfits around him and tells everyone to vote out Bill because he “doesn’t like him and he hates his voice and he is annoying.” All valid points in a game that is still TEAM-BASED. Jay the really, really, really good-looking model, realised that five men huddled together with a cameraman and soundguy nearby looks a bit suspicious so he casually inserts himself into the group. Awkward! Colton reassures him that they won’t be voting Jay out as they like him (like, really, really like him ). Phew! Bill, they say, will be going home first and Jay better take a stand with these misfits. Ken-Doll Matt, seeing what all this commotion is about, inserts his member into this circle. Dead silence. It is then that Tarzan starts to live up to the “eccentric, crazy old contestant” archetype I gave him in my previous post. Ken-Doll asks if his presence was destroying the strategy talk and Tarzan just confirms all this to him, short of confessing who was going to go home tonight. [Um, silence is golden Tarzan – add that to your bunch of clichés you spout non-stop.]
Matt, who has been portrayed as this intense and arrogant player, is not stupid. He suspects the vote is not going to go how he wants and he may be in trouble. He pulls Troyzan aside (the non-eccentric older contestant) and gives a rallying cry that involves cocks and hens. Yes, homo-erotic double entendres are rife in this post. Matt makes, what I personally think, is the smart case of keeping strong members of the tribe together whilst it is still team-based. To get rid of strong members at this stage of the game is suicidal as previous seasons have shown. Troyzan though is miffed that he wasn’t good enough to be one of Matt’s top cocks – deemed only worthy of being the Fifth Beatle in the Ab Four alliance. So he reveals his hand to the rest of the misfits that he wants to be seen as a cockhead instead and vote Matt out. Queen Colton doesn’t care which cock goes home – something he never dreamt of ever uttering in his life. That’s what dehydration and starvation does to you.
Tribal Council time and Dimples start needling the guys. Colton outs the fact that he will play his idol tonight. The non-plussed looks on Matt and Mike’s face confirms to me that they had suspected Colton had the idol. Dimples want more information and he pulls Colton up as to why he thinks spending so much time with the women in Survivor 24 (Island of Cooties) is a smart idea. Colton tries to backpedal a bit by saying it shouldn’t be assumed that he will side with the women come a merge. (Sure.) Bill (who has been high on coconut husks) becomes lucid enough to tell Dimples that whilst he and the frat-boys didn’t judge their Queen, this wasn’t reciprocated by Colton who judged them negatively immediately. The gift that keeps on giving (also known as Tarzan) tries to defend Colton but let’s slip information about the alliance of five. Matt, clearly believing that he is in danger, hammers Tarzan for trying to send messages to his alliance through deliberately coded words. He then makes an impassioned plea about being flexible with the vote as the game is always changing and that tonight will set the ball in motion one way or the other.
Okay, time to vote and no one’s vote is shown. One of the Ab Four is going home tonight, that’s for sure. To absolutely no-one’s surprise, Colton doesn’t play his idol. Votes are read-out. Colton, Bill, Matt (he’s screwed). Matt, Matt, Matt, (smirks all round from Troyzan, Tarzan, and the Queen), and Matt. And with that Ken-Doll gets his torch snuffed and walk out. As the music rise-up, Dimples announce that this was the first blind-side. Um, Jeff, this wasn’t a blindside. Matt knew that he was in trouble (and this was confirmed in his final words). Music start-up again and is again intererupted by Tarzan raising his hands wanting to know what the final two votes were. Jeff shakes his head and Colton tells Tarzan to save those questions for him. Colton takes Tarzan by the hand and explains on the walk back to camp the Survivor Voting Handbook 101.
So thoughts? I know I am in the minority as some of you are glad Matt went home. I just think that getting rid of the strong so early is a recipe for disaster, particularly if there is a tribal swap. It would have been so much smarter to vote out Colton tonight as everyone suspected that he wouldn’t play the idol.
Episode 4: A New Hope. As the Manono men tribe return after voting Matt out on Night 8, Mike realises that he is in danger. Rather than sucking up to the misfits, he disparages them for wanting to keep the tribe weak. Don’t disagree with that sentiment there Mikey, but maybe tone down the venom a bit. You’re in trouble. Sure enough, me Tarzan and you Troyzan have a little aside where they plan on voting out Stoner Bill next as they worry that he will mesmerise the rest of the alliance through the sharing of his coconut weed in order to break the misfit five up.
Day 9 and we hear Cougar Mommy crow about how the women have got things together and they are strong. They are catching snails, eating coconuts and rice. Cougar, you didn’t mention a protein there. Jonas and Troyzan show up and Jonas explains that like Jesus, he can feed the masses with fish if the women lend him their netting gear. This immediately gets Kim and Chelsea all riled up and a case of convenient amnesia break out. Chelsea tells Jonas and Troyzan that they don’t want to be bitches but they don’t need “y’all help.” Okay Chelsea, but when you need fire next time, don’t go running back to the men’s camp crying your eyes out.
Reward time comes and it involves something to do with sling shots, coconuts, and a life-size version of Connect Four. It was close initially but the women pull out a win. Really, the only highlight of this reward was to see that Tarzan hasn’t bothered learning Jonas’s name after a week-and-a-half (Jason he called him). Also a major case of sour grapes when Tarzan declared that it was only “luck” behind the women winning three challenges in a row. Way to add more fuel to the fire Tarzan! Dope!
Back at camp, the women mock Tarzan and his “crusty old-ass” sour-grapes comments. The men lament that the women are making a comeback with Jonas saying that he rather be “one-up” than win reward. No shit, Sherlock! Bill, realises that the women now have the momentum and they have to win the next immunity challenge. He chats with Leif (the Little Person) about their current state. Leif, being little, compensates for this with his big mouth when he tells Bill that he was supposed to go home at the first vote. Bill does a 180 degree whiplash with his neck upon hearing that. He knows that means he is the next to go. Leif tries to backpedal but the damage is done as Abs Mike overhears the conversation. Knowing that he is in danger, Mike runs off to Colton who is typically lying in the shelter doing nothing whilst everyone else is gathering firewood. He tells the Empress that Leif spilt the beans. “How dare that Munchkin run his mouth!” hollered the Queen of Spades. He orders quivering Mikey to fetch Leif. Queen Colton demands to hear the truth from Leif or he is the next to go. After a couple of seconds trying to backpedal, Leif fesses up and is told by the Queen that he can take his “Oompa Loompa” ass back to Munchkin-land as he is in big doo doo. At least Colton is prepared to insult people to their faces. Leif tries to rescue himself but Queen Colton won’t have a bar of it. He closes his eyes and shoos all servants away unless they are prepared to fan him plantains or feed him grapes.
The editors decide not to do a montage of sexy shots of the shirtless men or the bikini-clad women to fill in the gaps on Day 10. Instead we jump into Day 11 and it is Immunity time. After the women realise from tree mail that the challenge will involve communication and puzzles done in pairs, Kat immediately says she doesn’t want to partner with Alicia. Alicia takes major offence that the dumbest person in the tribe thinks she is too dumb to be her partner in this challenge. Who wouldn’t?
Immunity time and Colton is immediately crushed that he is tied up with Tarzan for this challenge as this was not what he dreamt about the night before. The challenge involved solving three individual puzzle pieces in pairs and then collecting three keys to unlock the chains to raise the flag. Sounds simple? It is. Unless you’re Chelsea and Alicia. This was embarrassing. They could not solve the first puzzle. They even resort of looking over to the men’s completed puzzle. This elicits yells of “Cheat!” and “Cheater!” from Tarzan (clearly forgetting that this is a game for $1 million rather than a schoolyard recess game). Chelsea snaps back with “Kiss my Ass!” – (many men would gladly take her up on that offer). The women are so pathetic that by the time Sabrina and Kim run out, Dimples is actively encouraging them to look at the men’s completed puzzle. And they STILL don’t get it right. The men win and whoop and holler with such class. When Dimples bring up how badly the women did, Alicia snorts and laughs it off. Dimples goes right to the jugular and calls her out for that. I’m not the biggest fan of loud-mouth Alicia but her “laughing” was just a way to hide the embarrassment of her sucky performance. But bad luck to her as this pissed off everyone else in the tribe, particularly Sabrina. She starts actively lobbying to get rid of Alicia. Kim, thinks it should be Christina but Alicia is adamant that Christina does more work around camp even though both suck at challenges. Kim is worried that Sabrina will get her way and betray the alliance.
The men are safe for tonight’s vote. Bill, being the bigger man, goes off to talk to Colton to try and clear the air. However, everyone (but Bill) knows not to interrupt the Queen’s beauty sleep. Queen Colton tells Stoner Bill that he doesn’t want to talk now and to go away. Bill makes the egregious mistake in pursuing his D&M with Colton despite Colton clearly telling him in no uncertain terms to go away. That’s it. The Queen is pissed. She and Bill have a heated argument and the Queen storms off and rages in her confessional that she wants Bill gone NOW. She bitches to Jonas and Troyzan and suggests that they have such major issues in the tribe, they should give up immunity to the girls and vote Bill off. Yeah, right. Who would be that stupid to agree with that?
“That would be….interesting,” says Jonas very slowly. Um, Jonas, didn’t you just say two days ago that it is important to be up on the numbers over the girls? Still, Jonas and Troyzan don’t look convinced, so Queen Colton runs off to the Abs Duo of Jay and Mike and suggest that they all agree to go to immunity. Jay is not down with that crazy scenario. None of them want to go but they have seen what happens to people who cross Colton. They don’t want to be in his crosshairs.
Troyzan tells Tarzan what Colton suggested as well as Leif’s big-mouth. Tarzan is pissed. He wants Leif gone for he betrayed their trust. He storms off and tells the women that there has been a “betrayal at camp” and that they might not be going to tribal council. The women can’t believe their luck. They start to weave their oestrogen black-magic over the men, willing these testosterone kuckle-heads to make the stupidest move in Survivor history. Sabrina tells her tribe that they would not do something this stupid as they all stick together. This is the same Sabrina that was wanting to break her alliance up to vote Alicia off. Still, I agree with her, the women as a whole would not contemplate anything this stupid. Kat might though but she doesn’t have an immunity idol to threaten people with.
Tarzan gathers all the men together and he proceeds to talk-down to Leif like a child – (which is duly emphasised with the patronising camera angle used by the cameraman). He tells Leif that he wants to vote him out for his egregious betrayal and he wants all the men to agree to go to Tribal Council tonight. Jay again protests proving that he has looks AND brains. Bastard! Colton is delighted by this turn of events as he wants to vote Bill out so he joins the fray to convince the men to satiate his appetite for vengeance. What are the men going to do? Will commonsense prevail? Will Emily Thorne get her vengeance on the Graysons? Wrong show, you say, but right sentiment! Ad break. Dammit!
We’re back and when the dumb-ass MEN appear at Tribal, Dimples had to be revived by the paramedics off-camera before returning to his hosting details. Ice-cream scooper Eric (Fans vs Favourites) , Crazy Brandon Hantz (Survivor 23: Endless Prayers), and JT (Heroes vs Villains) cheer at home for they can now relinquish their “dumbest Survivor” crown to these eight idiots! Jeff can’t believe how stupid the men are and immediately grills them. Troyzan defends the indefensible, saying that Leif betrayed their trust so he had to go home now. Jay confirms my thoughts that he reluctantly accepted to go to Tribal Council because he didn’t want to be targeted next time (by Colton). But none of the men can answer Jeff’s question sufficiently about why the urgency in voting someone out now whilst still a team-oriented game based on numbers. I don’t buy that crap about entering a merge without a united group is dangerous. Like these idiots know the meaning of being united.
Jeff then questions Colton as to who he doesn’t like in the game. “Bill” he says without any hesitation. He doesn’t like Bill because he is poor and doesn’t have a real job and he mooches off his friends because he is an unsuccessful comic. Bill gets quite emotional defending his choice to pursue his dream and struggling his whole life with money issues. But he says he doesn’t judge Colton for having a privileged upbringing and never having worked a day in his life. (Wow Bill, thanks for inflaming things with passive-aggressiveness). Bill wants to know why although the frat-four did not judge Colton, why then does he feel the need to judge him negatively. Colton responds maturely by rolling his eyes and basically giving the “talk-to-the-hand” routine. It could have ended there. It SHOULD have ended there. But Colton couldn’t stop. He wanted to say that it wasn’t because of their racial backgrounds that he doesn’t like Bill because he has plenty of “African-American” people he associates with. “Like who?” Jeff asks (God he’s good!). “Like my house-keeper” a sheepish Colton responds. “But she is a paid member” of the family (conveniently forgetting several hundred years of slavery and segregation that European-America was founded on). Mike, who is sitting between the two, cannot stop fidgeting upon hearing this. Colton tries to defend himself by saying that he knows there are people “out there” who may judge him but his Southern Country-Club friends are educated and opened-minded (and presumably wouldn’t be bigoted as well?). Colton, here’s some American history for you. Rich Southern plantation owners were the ones wanting to keep slavery. You are an ignorant fool!
Tarzan, is also stunned by the pronouncements at Tribal Council. He pipes in and starts raising his voice – doing justice to the memory of Crazy Brandon’s multiple outbursts last year at Tribal Council. He stresses it isn’t a racial issue and doesn’t want people to get that impression with what Colton has just spouted. He says people should be judged on their own merits and something about Barack Obama being black and the current president – so there!
Tarzan is probably the only member of both tribes that can still remember what segregation was like and he actually makes sense. He is keenly aware that viewers at home may view Colton’s outburst as racist when it shouldn’t be. He has a point and I didn’t take it as racist, but it steers far enough into those murky waters that Colton should never have aired his thoughts. This was a Tribal Council where the things said will follow Colton post-game. Some of you may think what Colton said was racist towards Bill. However, what cannot be denied was how he belittled Bill and made him feel like crap in front of everyone. And Colton loved every moment of it. That’s what bullies do. Colton, I hope you enjoy your hate mail and death threats following this episode. With that said, it is time to vote. We only see Colton’s vote and it is for Bill. He’s deadmeat. I recall Colton saying prior to Tribal that he has a way of making people do what he wants.
Colton doesn’t play the idol and the votes are read out. Bill is sent home and I would say this goes down as the first (semi) blindside as Bill thought it would be Leif going home but knew that it could have gone his way. As Bill walks out, Colton refuses to look at his direction – probably editing I would say. My respect for Stoner Bill shot up in his Final Words when he said that although Colton judged him for their differences, he embraced him for the same reasons.
I know I wrote last week that I couldn’t see how Colton could be a villain – I take that back. He is a villain who is prepared to cross that line (like Russell in Heroes vs Villains) and make things personal through bullying, belittling, and threatening others. Damn you Sabrina for giving Colton that idol. She has unleashed the monster within! So who do you think was down with this plan to go to Tribal? I’m thinking it was Colton, Tarzan, and Troyzan and they should be called Tweedle-Dumb, Tweedle-Dim, and Tweedle-Dense! As the most outspoken members of the Misfits Five, they would have given the Ab Three zero say in how they wanted things to play out.
Next week, we get snippets of Colton’s power influencing all. Jonas says he’ll be Colton’s bitch (as if he isn’t already) and then a twist sends them all into a tizz. Pish, posh. I’ll call it now. A tribal swap. The past two seasons with boys vs girls scenario (Amazon and Vanuatu) always involved a tribal swap at around episode 5. Geez, and I thought Colton watched this show religiously!
JStar, on behalf of Sue N, Russel Not Happy, Daze and myself, THANK YOU, THANK YOU! your recap was excellent, you definitely have the gift of putting it all together and saying exactly what happened. Colton is becoming a monster, I just don’t get why the men do as he asks, its crazy, but good television! I bet Jeff couldn’t believe his luck! Please keep up the good work JStar and good luck with your thesis for channel 9!
Thanks Jstar. Can’t believe the men are so gormless.
Hey Andrew and Maz. No sweat on the recap. I’ll make sure I’ll be a lot quicker next time. Men are gormless but can you blame them when Colton is threatening everyone who crosses him. He’s turned into a gay version of Boston Rob – (“You’re either with me or you’re against me”). Anyone who pisses him off gets his throat slit. I know people have complained in the past about how the hidden immunity idol changes the power dynamics of the game. This is a perfect example of how absolute power corrupts absolutely.
TCKFAS – love it!
Bravo JStar – you nailed it, I so look forward to your recaps going forward.
I would really love to know your thoughts on why didnt a breakaway group of men blind-side Queen Colton – didn’t have the numbers or best keeping Colton around as he wouldnt receive many votes in Final 3?
I am really like Monica – I know she not in an alliance over at the girls camp but by the looks of next weeks previews we are getting a tribe swap – I so hope things work in her favour she seems pretty cluey!
Love your description of Kat …………
JSTar – email them to me and I can put them up on a fresh blog post each week.
Hey RR. I’m honoured and would love to help out. Definitely will e-mail through and I’ll make sure I’ll get them out on time! Probably need your touch with the edit funcion.
Although, I stand by my cocks, coconuts, and ladyboy descriptions of the contestants.
TCFKAS, I don’t think the guys realised how dangerously out-of-control Colton has become until it was too late. There clearly was a power struggle between the Abs Four and the Misfits and whilst they were butting horns, they failed to notice the monstrous queen that was always lurking within. Tarzan and Troyzan are just as myopic as Matt was. They wanted to control the tribe and Colton just fed their egos. Blindsiding Colton when his vote was so valuable in Episode 3 was not on the cards. But now Colton has let that power go to his head cause he has the idol and everyone is too scared to make a move – less he is sent home after receiving one lousy vote at Tribal Council.
I too love Cougar Monica. She is sharp and if she plays her cards right, she can navigate herself out of her current predicament. She clearly has more brains than Methane Kat.
JStar, fantastic recap, fun to read, you got some real talent!
RR, I was expecting a big thank you from you to JStar for a great recap that you were unable to deliver. But….. just an instruction to send you an email instead…..
Russel Not Happy – I thought the thank you was implied and I also thanked JStar previously.
Seriously Russel Not Happy why all this animosity? Not sure is you are a regular commentator just commenting under another name or a newbie. Some context would be welcome.
Hey Russel Not Happy. I didn’t take offence. RR is right. She thanked me previously on the first post (see 13) so I don’t need my ego stroked further. But thanks for the compliments as well! Can’t wait for tomorrow night now!
Why not recap your life for the blog, Russ? It won’t take long.
*walks in, looks around, shakes head, thinks “some people need to get a life”, goes back to his day-dream about plump cocaine-fuelled nymphos (ahhh…Ajay)*
CB, you never cease to amuse me, I bet you would go on Survivor if Ajay was there! Russel Not Happy, don’t worry about anything, all is good, JStar is happy to do it and it sounds like he knows what he’s talking about, he can do a much better job than you and I as he is a true fan of Survivor.
Well, what a friggin let down those 2 episodes were – first my main gal gets the boot – which they then realised next episode was a dumb ass move – then the Queen falls ill and gets Medi evacuated out!
I will be totally surprised at the re-union show if Colton actually does have his appendix (?) out – what a frigging wus he was – it just looked all so fake – what do you all think?
I also have to vent at my disbelief in the way he spoke to Christina – have seen a lot of bullying on Survivor before but dont think I have seen it that bad – imagine Colton telling her to jump in the fire – FFS – really riled me up! Iam very happy Colton gone – the most selfish wanker I have ever seen play the game! Just wish though he could have been blindsided!
The merge happened quickly didnt it? Or is that just because we have been having double episodes and it just seems to be going quick?
Look forward to your thoughts JStar………… reccap soon?
Sioux Denim – couldn’t agree with you more on ALL of your points!!
I was totally bummed that Colton didn’t get blindsided in a future episode rather than be taken by illness. I think I heard them say afterwards that it wasn’t acutally his appendix, just a stomach infection.
There was some terrible bullying going on too, just awful.
And yes Cochrane, looking forward to the next recap. Thanks for your previous ones, very entertaining.
How funny is Tarzan with his crazy words!
I love Tarzan – ya gotta have a kooky one in there!
Kim and Chelsea are playing well, hope they align themselves with the right crowd too.
Hope Alicia is the next to go – really spewin Monica left…………
I hope Alicia is gone next too!
Couldn’t agree more about the bullying, it was really terrible and I think the producers, camera crew whoever should have stepped in. Apart from stupid Colton, Alicia teamed up with him as well to bully Christina so much I’m amazed that she didn’t burst into tears. Alicia is a special ed teacher which makes it worse as she should be totally against bullying, she was disgusting telling Christina not to touch her when she asked her to move up so that they all had room to lie in the shelter and that she would hit her if she did! Then her and Colton laughing together as they bullied Christina was terrible! When Colton then had his appendicitis attack, Christina was the only one to help him, and I’m sure she was doing it to be nice and helpful, not to suck up to him like Alicia was doing! It didn’t take Alicia long to turn on Colton when she realized he wasn’t going to give her the immunity idol, she is a nasty piece of work, hope she goes next! Colton is just a precocious, spoilt brat, I hope his parents are proud of his behaviour! I bet he returns to the show like a bad smell.
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