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Farmer Wants A Wife – No Wonder Some Cannot Get Wives

Newsflash I am not sure it is not just the isolation of their farms that are stopping these guys from getting a wife there are a few duds in this lot.

Let’s go through them one by one:

Farmer Sam – This guy needs to realise if you are getting the ladies to camp out you need to put on the charm, and this was one thing he lacks. When the new girl was introduced to him as the one his mother selected he said “I pick my own girls” and  stomped back to his tent. She had brought breakfast and was trying to set up the scene as she had been told to and he was just a pig. Good on her for leaving. She dodged a bullet.

Farmer Paul – He doesn’t seem to realise you have to have a relationship you need to actually spend time with women. Most guys hide in their sheds once they have been with their partners for a couple of years, but this guy barely knows their first names and he is hiding in there. Though maybe being stuck in the house with a lady who told him she has a wedding dress hanging in her wardrobe since she was in her twenties has got him spooked.

Farmer Todd – Who would want to be stuck on Bruny Island population 600 with a guy who can barely string a sentence together. Also it would be a long lonely winter, hell when the girls rocked up to the pub there was no one there.

Farmer Tom – Mr nice guy has gone hard early with one of his girls, with a very long snogging session. You kind of get the feeling he might regret that in later episodes that he went in so quickly. His other girls including the stalker type Kirsty were not happy, however it was funny the kooky new girl had no clue of the tension in the air and kept on doing her donkey impersonation.

Farmer Nikko – He finally revealed to the girls that he was really quite wealthy and lived in a luxury compound with his parents. Personally a few more eps in the shack would have sorted out who was genuine. Rachel who is there to win, not find love, was petulant when she found the mother was around, but her competitive nature kicked in and she wrestled a kiss out of him. She thinks this might give her some advantage in the love stakes. He has some nice girls there I hope he dodges a bullet with this one.

Farmer Matt – He is the good looking bland potato farmer. I am not quite sure why law graduate Kristen wants a farmer, it would be bit of a career limiting move. Also she appears to be too sassy and intelligent for him. Yeah he would have a rocking body from harvesting but long term it would be dullsville once you had cooked through all your potato recipes.

Farmer Wants A Wife on NINE at 8.oopm on Wednesday and Thursday nights.


1 reality chick { 08.23.12 at 11:55 am }

Nice recap. I watched it last night the whole way through for the first time. It’s like a weird harem dating show, which is disturbing and compelling at the same time.

2 Georgie { 08.23.12 at 12:08 pm }

Oh boy, a girl would have to be desperate to put her lot in with Sam. He’s got absolutely nothing going for him – nothing that’s showing anyway.

3 Daze { 08.23.12 at 12:19 pm }

Farmer Paul – yuk what a place to bring a potential wife to and sleeping out in the paddock? He has nothing to offer except hard work and some grunts.
Farmer Sam – rough and a loner/wanderer, won’t commit to girl, wife, job. Money, house stability I think is what potential wives would be wanting, not going from job to job?
Farmer Nikko – hope he realises false Rachel is a gold digger, not a stayer but a player
Tom and Matt are my favourites so far. Most genuine. I do think there will be a serious love match in this series with either of these two (armchair prediction)

Last season was sooooooooo yawnsville tedious, they have spruced this season up but I wonder if its a bit too campy. Still it’s thrown some of the farmers having their family send in a new girl. Don’t know that I would like that either.

4 brain dead dave { 08.23.12 at 12:43 pm }

Farmer Sam is just a rude arsehole that even a blow up doll would try to get away from.

Natalie G was on morning TV this morning , trying to cut Sam some slack saying it was early in the morning, he’s not a morning person and he apologised later blah ,blah, blah. Rubbish.

5 JK { 08.23.12 at 12:50 pm }

I used to watch bits of the show many seasons ago but non of the farmers seem to interest me as per many seasons ago. Rockin’ recap RR!

6 Georgie { 08.23.12 at 12:52 pm }

Todd on Bruny Island comes across as someone who’s had one too many tugs on the cone. It’s like there’s some huge joke and he’s the only one who gets it.

7 Joseph Skyrim { 08.23.12 at 1:00 pm }

Could tell Sam was nasty from the first ep. Just something in his demeanour.

8 A.P { 08.23.12 at 1:12 pm }

How rude was Farmer Sam to humiliate the new girl like that? Obviously the producers thought it would be cute to do that scene but they really should have cut it out altogether for the sake of that poor girl. Hope his other girls saw how nasty he was to her.
Rachel was also mean about Nikko’s mother,saying she hates Mummy’s boys when she barely knows her or Nikko! At least give the mother a chance Rachel, one day you might be the mother of a grown up son, its not that easy you know!
As for Farmer Todd, yuck!

9 Culinary Boner { 08.23.12 at 1:15 pm }

I lost track that this was on.

Pity. I’d been assuming that the only reality shows at present were Big Brother (which makes me regret my membership of the human race) and a slurry of them rancid caterwauling comps. Must make an effort to see this.

Farmer Sam sounds no more than a ‘traditionalist’ to me. Surely these women shouldn’t too surprised that some rural (and urban) blokes reckon a wife is something you strap on for a ride after yer Friday night drinking session. Surely?

10 Georgie { 08.23.12 at 1:21 pm }

CB, Sam lives in ‘the long paddock’, so he doesn’t even have somewhere half decent to bed a woman after his Friday night drinking session. In terms of finding a wife, he’s a total loser – dirty, greasy and I guess smelly too. Yuck!

11 brain dead dave { 08.23.12 at 1:25 pm }

I guess Sam sometimes puts on the Ritz and has his women spreadeagled over the quad bike late on Friday nights when he gets home.

12 Georgie { 08.23.12 at 1:28 pm }

How romantic bdd – I hope he lights a candle.

13 brain dead dave { 08.23.12 at 1:31 pm }

For an extra bit of foreplay and a vibrating effect , Sam turns the quad bike on. If the lady’s lucky ,she won’t have to share the seat with a sleeping kelpie.

14 Georgie { 08.23.12 at 1:34 pm }

Rofl bdd – you’re really breathing life into this character. Do you own a quad bike?

15 Culinary Boner { 08.23.12 at 3:07 pm }

lol Georgie & bdd
very romantic
Why am I thinking Wolf Creek though?

16 Gidgit { 08.23.12 at 3:19 pm }

Farmer Sam is just the most horrible pig I’ve seen on TV for a long time. He’s thick as shit, has no manners and just wants a root from a girl under a size 12. If he had walked out of that tent and Megan Gale was sitting there he would be all over her like Hugh Hefner on a 21 year old. The fact the girl the mother sent was of a bigger size instantly put him off and he was more than obvious about it. Strange thing is the girl had a nicer face than the three skanks in the tent.
My mother always said ‘water finds it’s own level’ and what ever girl stays with Sam and doesn’t run a country mile – is just as scummy as he is.

Todd is a boofhead moron and trying to have a convesation with him would be like slamming your head against a brick wall.

I can’t help but judge all these girls too. Hey, they are on tv. No one forced them to apply. The fact they are reduced to fighting for attention over other girls for the affection of some slack jawed yocal amazes me. The pure desperation is pathetic. And if they are just in it to get famous – well I’d understand that more than wanting to live in Buttfuck Nowhere with 60 cows, some hay stacks and a half wit in a flanny!

17 Culinary Boner { 08.23.12 at 3:24 pm }

Great promo copy Gidgit.
I’m-a-watching next week – well, after I pop it in the Foxtel IQ and convince Mrs Boner.

18 Gidgit { 08.23.12 at 3:59 pm }

Cheers. It got me a tad ‘agro’ last night. At one stage I was giving my TV the finger – and my partner walked out and said ‘what the hell are you doing?’

So glad you have Foxtel IQ. I lost mine for four days and nearly walked out onto the highway in depression!

Do convince Mrs Boner. Good luck. Mr VonLarue watches it – under duress.

19 c { 08.23.12 at 8:11 pm }

RR that recap is utterly hilarious

20 A.P { 08.23.12 at 9:46 pm }

@8, I made amistake with the names. Farmer Paul is the yuck one! Even more so after tonight. Good on that woman using her kids as an excuse to leave him!
Farmers Sam and Todd not far behind Paul!

21 Georgie { 08.23.12 at 10:46 pm }

What’s with all these sooking females? If I was a bloke I’d run a mile but men can be so naive when it comes to the ways of a wily woman.

*If Sam is only 33, all I can say is, it must be a bloody hard life. I can imagine his girls scratching each others eyes out trying to be the one sent home.
*I bet there’s a few kids named Baa-sil running around Paul’s place.
*Matt is lucky sooky Jessi tackled herself. She’d be a hard one to get rid of if you gave her any sort of encouragement.
*Tom should have taken the opportunity to get rid of sooky Kristy while he had the chance. The look on her face when he sent Georgie packing said it all. She’s got him in a wedlock already.
*A pity Nikko didn’t wire the girls, then he’d know what a deadly specimen Rachel is. Finding out about the $ has just hardened her resolve.
*Todd is one weird cookie and whoever he decides to marry had better be a good swimmer – Bruny is not far from the mainland.

22 ruby { 08.23.12 at 11:27 pm }

What a pity the ladies don’t get to see the day’s filming, at the end of each day. I’m sure though, that Sam will show his true colours again, and again, and the ladies will see him for the arrogant, chauvanistic, obnoxious pig that he is. There is nothing endearing about this man at all. RUN LADIES GIRLS, RUN! What woman would leave their friends and family and to go live in a campsite?!!! Where is this wanderer’s home again? Oh, correct me if I’m wrong, but there is no home is there?!

23 Gidgit { 08.24.12 at 12:55 am }

Let’s face it folks – anyone that signs up for this show is after some fame. You do not ‘find love’ on a tv reality show. And yes I know a few have got married and good for them, but there are some fame whores in the pack for sure – or I hope so – because the other option of ‘so desperate they are willing to move to nowhere and marry some farmer’ is much scarier!

I respect the girl that left tonight because ‘it was not natural’ and ‘all felt weird’ – but if the silly bitch has never watched the show before and didn’t know what to expect – why sign up? This show has run several seasons now. It’s not like you cannot do any ‘research’!

Hell’s bells – I’ve signed up for a show and it’s near IMPOSSIBLE to get one episode of it as it is from another country, but I did everything in my power to see the ‘frame’ of the show so now I know what to expect.

Oh, and wish me luck! I ‘audition’ next Thursday!

24 A.P { 08.24.12 at 12:32 pm }

Gidgit, what show are you auditioning for?

25 Gidgit { 08.24.12 at 2:05 pm }

It’s all hush hush – but it does have to do with ‘cooking’ (not MC) I’m a bit nervous but more excited and have faith in my dish. Only hope they do not can it now there is some changes in the ranks.

Oh, and thanks hon.

26 kay { 08.24.12 at 8:26 pm }

i think a lot of the girls in there are just there for the fame. a lot of them try very hard to be picked and they try harder to stay to the last episode and once the show’s finished, that is the end of the relationship that they fought so hard with a lot of tears and drama

27 Gidgit { 08.24.12 at 9:34 pm }

@kay Yep – infact I’d say MOST of them are there for fame and a ‘career’ …or a Zoo magazine spread. And take into consideration when a lot of women get into a ‘I’ll scratch your eyes out’ scenerio, which they are in – they literally turn into bitches. They are looking at these drongo farmers like they are the main prize. I actually think instead of the farmers they could have had a puppy and these girls would all still be at each other’s throats.

28 NN { 08.26.12 at 10:08 pm }

I actually know Rachel and she is exactly how the show portrays her not much of a shock just a good laugh at how much of an ass she is making of herself!

29 spring76 { 09.20.12 at 7:23 pm }

Rachel is one fake, money-chasing schmuck. Hope Nikko comes to his senses!
NN – Rachel strikes me as a spoilt north shore princess? As you say you know her, please tell me i am wrong…