Guest Post: House Rules – The First Reveal – Did You Expect Those Results?
Annajjj has been working harder then these renovators writing these recaps. A big thank you.
Over to you Annajjj:
It’s the day we’ve all been waiting for – well those of us who haven’t switched to Master Chef and are still nailed to the house reno in NSW. Reveal day! But first we get a quick recap of the highlights (?!) from the past week and then into the final frantic hours of the renovation.
Snow White and their dwarves re-enact the escape scene from Sound of Music and I think we should drink twice for that, then a quick montage of Carole hating Gapper, Lisa struggling with life, Bomber being obnoxious and we don’t see anything of Maddie and Lloyd who are obviously maintaining their undercover plan.
Quick shot of the bathroom which seems to have a heavily tiled feature wall and then one tile stuck on the opposite wall. Not really paying attention to McCrave’s suggestions there. There are some very bright colours going in and some unpleasant scenes of Bomber being an absolute tool. Haven’t seen much to like about this bloke so far. Iggy is feeling lost and confused and he calls Carole for support which seems like a bad idea and it is. She is too busy screaming at the GPS to waste any time screaming at him so Iggy is left to manage on his own which he does by wandering around in little circles. McCrave, wearing macramé, comes to the rescue to remind Iggy that she is a designer. Thank god for that – we finally have a designer in the house. She suggests wrapping the kitchen in alfoil or some such nonsense and beats a hasty retreat when Iggy tries to go in for a kiss of gratitude.
In Snow Whites zone we have a black and white tub (ha!) and some sort of pink art. These two like pink a lot. Over to Carly and the Gosling who are worried they might really hate their free reno. Back at TFWFH Mel tries unsuccessfully to engage Bomber in decisions and then Maddie and Lloyd are uncovered and they tell us people underestimate them. Probably because they’ve forgotten you even exist.
Jo appears and reminds everyone they have one hour, ten minutes, five minutes, three minutes to go. She’s like an annoying snooze alarm when you’re a bit hung-over and just want to stay in bed. Bomber yells at Mel, Adam swears at Lisa and even Lloyd gets a bit frustrated. The men don’t seem to be handling this pressure very well do they? Snow White tell us they are a pair of winners but not in those shirts you’re not, then Carole tells Russell to get the table in and he says ok and she yells back “don’t argue with me” and Bomber is still pitching fits all over the place and it’s a bit stressful to actually watch these last few minutes. Then its all over, tools down, we’re done.
Everyone looks shattered apart from Lisa who looks fresh as a daisy and very relaxed. Next to her Adam is almost collapsing with exhaustion. There are hugs and kisses even from the Gappers and Team Bomb and Bomber says he’s let Mel down by not finishing the bathroom ceiling. No he’s let her down by acting like a jerk the past week. We’ve not seen much to endear us to Bomber.
Joe and Wendy arrive to judge and disappointingly Joe’s pants seem quite normal and boring. They start in the living room and its bright citrus colours with a strange feature wall that distracts from the fireplace. Joe agrees and then points out that the painting job is pretty rubbish. They head into the laundry and Joe is confused about what he is supposed to do with himself in the space between the pantry and the laundry. Anything you like Joe. Maddi and Lloyd have accidently left the protective covering on the joinery so Wendy helpfully pulls a bit off to make it look better.
Into Team Bomb’s zone and the bathroom is impressive but in the spare room TFWFH doors have been hacked off and propped up against the wall like some bizarre statement of hatred and its hard to believe Carly and Ryan will think that is an improvement. The judges think its awful and it is.
Into the master bedroom and Wendy absolutely adores it until Joe starts pointing out all the bits he hates, everything, so suddenly Wendy hates it too. The bathroom is good and they like the bath weapon. The living room gets a heaping dose of criticism – judges hate the artwork but not nearly as much as they hate the artwork in the entry. The study is unfinished and Joe has been pre-warned not to hate Nan’s painting so he loves it instead. The kitchen is great and both judges are impressed.
Back at House Rules headquarters the teams assemble for the scores and I miss some of the comments as I’m busy hating Russell’s shirt. There are a few sob stories from various contestants and Dwarves Drink! The Gappers says something about being too old to pay off their mortgage. The judges arrive and tell the teams they’ve done a great job which flies in the face of all the criticisms we’ve just witnessed from them.
Snow White: Loved the bed, hated the lighting, the WIR was wrong but the bathroom was great. 6 &6 and lucky we have Jo here to add that up for us – total score of 12
Team Bomb: Liked the bathroom tiles but no one can get past the wardrobe doors so 5&5
Maddi and Lloyd: Good furniture, feature wall is all wrong and not enough thought given to the day to day living in the laundry. Who lives day to day in the laundry? 4&5
Adam and Ditz: Flooring is a win but everything else is a fail and apparently they didn’t follow the house rules. 3&4 and the smile is very nearly wiped off Adam’s face.
The Cappers: Excellent kitchen, they totally nailed it, only a few small mistakes like staying married to each other and they get the top score of 7&7.
Several hours worth of ad breaks later (and thank you Peter A for pointing out that Mothers day is the reason for the over soak of perfume, jewellery and chocolate advertising) and were back for the home owners reveal.
Candy and Ryan arrive and Ryan is keeping his expectations low; he just wants it to be everything they’ve ever wanted.
Lots of Oh My God and they seem to be happy at first. They love the arty edgy laundry/pantry and the kitchen and the artwork in the kitchen. Candy loves mismatched chairs. It’s very now. They think the Cappers have nailed it but where is the concrete? Is it the bench top? And is that concrete or Caesar stone and what is the difference? Into the living room and Ryan loves the TV of course but hates the artwork and they hate the artwork in the entry too. Into the study and fortunately they love Nan’s artwork.
Into the master bedroom and they like (not love) it and sucked in Joe they like the light fitting. Bathroom is good but the bath doesn’t get the attention it was hoping for and the mirror allows for a good shot of Candy’s boobs but not much else. The other bathroom is also given a tick of approval and the risky tile feature wall is good. Then into the spare room and the moment we’ve all been waiting for and “Told ya they’d ruin it” Candy whines. But it’s not ruined Candy. It’s deconstructed. It’s very now.
Over to HR headquarters and C&R arrive and tell everyone they did a fantastic job.
Snow White: They really like the useful walk in robe, especially now that their beloved cupboard has been destroyed – 6
Team Bomb: Bathroom tiles are great, guest room is great. Beloved cupboard has been destroyed but still a good score of 7
Maddi and Lloyd: They loved the living room and laundry and no cupboards were destroyed so that’s a plus but the finishes were dodgy and 6
Adam and Ditz: Pretty much hated everything and they failed the house rules and 5
The Cappers: Absolutely loved it and wow big score – 9
So the Gappers are at the top of the leader board and they are so happy they actually show each other some affection and they have a surprise coming and their house is up next – is that the surprise? Adam and Lisa are at the bottom and they also have a surprise coming up which we wont find out until tomorrow night but we actually do find out thanks to the previews and also because we know what happened last season and yep they are camping out at the Cappers.