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Guest Post: When Love Comes…All Over A Reunion! Awkward!

So the girls are finally back where they feel most comfortable – in the big smoke! Leaving 60% of single fellas standing around playing with their livestock or grapes! Never the mind, the girls are in the hotel bathroom duding themselves up for TV.  Natalie Grizzledick warms herself up for some ‘hard core’ pawning over the girls and guys like some match maker guru. Where are the tough questions like on the American shows? You are not their mother! And time for a fringe Nat, just saying!

The girls all meet each other again over some bubblies and I’m guessing – down at the docks near Pyrmont Sydney. I know my city bi-atches! All the girls are beyond happy from meeting each other again more than meeting the guys aside from a few. Hey, free holiday! Plus like all reality shows they get paid. Hell I did jury duty and got paid more than my salary! I was only too happy it was dragged on for 6 months! I was Henry Fonda in 12 Angry Men god damn it!

First interview is Zoe and she thinks she’s in love with Doug because he looks like he could be her brother…and how is staying or going SUCH a ‘hard decision’?  Hell back in my 20’s I’d hang around anyone anywhere for a new experience! Oh Kangaroo Island, Airlie Beach etc – yes please! So Zoe’s caveman shows up meaning they are still a thing? Nat makes sure to kiss the guys on the cheek so she doesn’t seem like a slut wench – smart move. Turns out, on the shows budget, Ugg has been taking Zoe out on romantic thingies around the Barrier Reef.  Back to the studio and Nattie is all a gush (what’s new?) and predicts they’ll ‘go the distance’ – that obviously arouses them and bring on uncomfortable kiss. I stand by my twitter statement – chicks kissing each other is SO much sexier!

Next is Shelley – sorry Renee – who got REALLY lucky with Mitch! Renee is picky, a lot pickier than she really should be (what’s with that??). Know your limits ladies. So Mitch shows up and it’s all kind of awkward and weird. The more he compliments Renee the more she does stink face. Tip – ALL the guys mention sense of humour girls! Time to start watching Monty Python movies! Really – test their ‘sense of humour’ scale. ANOTHER awkward kiss….STOP IT! It’s now 4.42am (seriously) & my bitch of a cat is freaking out over the wind but I’ll continue like a soldier in the ditches! Sail/Sale in Victoria turned out to one of the more successful ‘scrag drop offs’ leaving two scrags behind which I think is BINGO! Renee hit herself in the face then had Reggie make her sick – so romantical! Then which I think is the best connection Abbey falls for Leigh the not gay hairdresser. They will make gorgeous babies. Take it from me ladies, everyone has faults, even you (shock horror) so stick with it, work it out! Abbey is all ‘he’s hot, love him’. Renee is all ‘yeah ok, he’s fine I guess’. Who will last – I wonder? So both guys of course are there. In comes Leigh and Reggie. Leigh is Abbey’s ‘smitten kitten fitten for some rootin’ and Reggie is….there.  Leigh and Abbey live on opposite sides of the country so guess it’s time for both of them to move to Alice Springs!  Nat Guzzlefuck asks Leigh to tell Abbey he loves her, but he doesn’t so there is that.

Reggie is a sweet guy and really quite sexy in that quaint way. Renee can’t see that really and doesn’t seem happy! Nat tries to talk this up but really doesn’t get the hint that Renee is really insulting Reggie in a round-about way!

Robukka/Repucca/Rycucca/Raapukka time! Last time I’ll have to think up crazy ways of spelling her name thank god! Rypukka tried to seduce all the guys because she’s a mega prick tease (oh get over it – did you see the footage of her in the ‘hope she shaved’ short skirt ‘going to work’ – oh please) even saying to one guy ‘I’m REALLY open to affection’ meaning ‘I’m up for anything for attention’. So she decided the girls that ‘stay’ get as much air time so stayed with Sam in Orange, the P.E teacher. No surprises Roobukkas news is a big shock (more air time) saying the evil Sam has pissed off overseas and dropped her like a hot scone to be somewhere else on a text message. Now this whole thing was set up (as it all was) as Nat gets to see this horrible text, Roopukka reads it out – and if you have ever seen Nicole Kidman in To Die For – that is Rubekka.  She plays the victim when she has really probably killed Sam and buried him in his backyard. Yes, when one cries, tears come next. Just weeping and putting your hands up over your eyes while sobbing is not crying. This whole thing is bullshit and I had people have a go at me on Twitter for saying that. Say what you will. I’ve been around long enough to know what it bullshit! Can we maybe hear from HIM? Yes every story has two sides (although seems depending on what that is about in Australia that goal post gets moved) so let’s hear from him?!? Bring on fake crying and drama – turns out the show knew she’d be perfect for that dramatic moment in the show! Well picked. Nat cannot even act well in this whole scene. Did they really need to do this?? And why was Nat not comfortable reading it out. Not like it said ‘piss off slut, you stink like poo – plus I just slept with your grandmother’.  None of this made any sense. Does anyone know Sam? Contact me if you do. Hell, I live close to Orange. Might go and do my own research. If you want me to stop Ch 9, send me ten thousand dollars in unmarked bills (not sure why that is required but sounds cool).

In Port Macquarie Shahid and Nikki go to Steph Walkers place for a party – ok not really. Nikki stayed with Shahid who was really quite hot and Nikki is…fit.  Everyone has good teeth so there is that! When Love Comes to the Dentist!  So that is it for the match ups. The rest of the failures – sorry singles – are hanging out in the Pyrmont bar while the couples kiss in front of them just to rub it in! Awe bless. And no I don’t want to see more of Roopukkieaaas heart breaking tale online. I’ll skip that thanks. And this new season of The Block Glasshouse looks SO pretentious and phoney – might have to review that if RR is ok with it! *If you want me to stop Ch 9 – employ me – it’s your only hope!*

See you on twitter!


1 Amy { 06.25.14 at 10:35 am }

You never fail to amuse RR. Zoe looked like she wanted to be sick when poor Doug kissed her, her body language did not match what was said and dropping the L bomb during the speech about him being beautiful,why do I get the feeling she would just tell anyone she loved them. Especially for a holiday in Airliey Beach. Shes faker than that giant faux diamond ring on her finger.

As for Rebekkah being broken up via text… Yeah right. That is all that needs to be said there.

Hope they all enjoyed the free holiday and 15 minutes of fame in second rate trash magazines and cheese radio stations.

2 Veronicali { 06.25.14 at 10:50 am }

“one of the more successful ‘scrag drop offs’ ” Gold!!

3 daisy { 06.25.14 at 11:06 am }

Thanks GVL. I thought Natalie was pushing Leigh to say he was going to move to Perth. Waiting…waiting….no.

Yeah what is it with plain Jane Renee, who at last admitted she was a pretty crappy country girl. I suspected that because of the number of times she she showed bewilderment and disdain whenever she was expected to do any work. Renee proves “treat ’em mean and keep’em keen works even for plain girls.
I find it fascinating how beauty is in the eye of the beholder: vet guy said his bruiser girl was nice looking, and Ugg thought Zoe was god lokin? Na and na, imo.

Anyone notice that Reggie looks like the comedian who used to be a regular on The Comedy Company? The guy who played the priest with a rubber duck in the bathtub.
Best chick; JJ. In the end I was disappointed because Tash ended up looking like she was there for self promotion.

Silly me, I warmed to ditsy Rebekka. But JJ was my fav.

I thought it was funy that Sam had to tell Rebekka he was leaving the country to get away from her. ” I can’t see you anymore because I have joined the French Foreign Legion”.

And since Nat was such a sticky beak asking to se the text, it must have ben BAD, or boring, for her to say shw wasn’t COMFORTABLE reading it out. Are you kidding me? What is comfortable about asking an awkward couple,”So is this love????”

4 Bolders { 06.25.14 at 11:30 am }

RR what happened to my incredibly insightful comment?

5 why { 06.25.14 at 12:45 pm }

What happened to the Barossa couple – no follow ups? What happened to the blonde lady with the 7 year old son who stayed in Robe with the surfing instructor? I saw her all dressed up for the finale but no interview….hmmmmmm, interesting. This show was no great love success as Channel 9 hoped for I am sure.
The Toni Collette look-a-like, who went to Sale was quite uncomfortable with seeing her man again. When they mentioned they hadn’t seen each other since Sale, I guess that said it all. She could hardly look at him!

6 Kylie { 06.25.14 at 2:27 pm }

I normally catch up on RR while I am nursing my daughter. I have soon learnt not to when reading anything posted by GVL as I will ALWAYS end up laughing out aloud over something you say, resulting in a cranky baby :-) love your way with words and the fact you call a spade a spade!

7 Eliza { 06.25.14 at 2:28 pm }

I just realised last night, too that they didn’t speak to Gemma! What was with that?!

Shelley didn’t look happy to be there with Reggie, no..

Yep, as discussed previously, Daisy.. I was scratching my head many times as to how the guys found some of the girls so beautiful.

The whole Sam breaking up with Rebekah via text thing was odd.. maybe he did have to flee to get away from her?

8 daisy { 06.25.14 at 2:31 pm }

Oh yeah Why, Minderella and her dag, and Miss ‘I love chn so much I want you to have your nuts crushed”. She got the rich guy who had so many estates he needed heirs.

9 daisy { 06.25.14 at 2:36 pm }

And visa verza Eliza, how did the girls like some of those guys?
Seriously? The guys at Airlie beach?

I suppose any super hotties are waiting to sign on to be the next Bach.

When we were young the question was should we or shouldn’t we get into the line up for Miss West Coast. There was a bit of stigma to it so we didn’t.
Now it must be, which RTV show do I try out for.

10 Eliza { 06.25.14 at 2:45 pm }

Yeah, a lot of the guys on this show were not attractive as we very much pointed out along the way 😉 Maybe we have too higher expectations.. maybe this is why I am perpetually single? Nahhhh…

Tom was the only legit hottie.. Moshe was good.

I haven’t had a chance to read these recaps yet.. will be back later any bet.

OHHHH YEAAAHHHH and Mindy, too.. what the heck was going on???

11 daisy { 06.25.14 at 2:52 pm }

I thought the guy who was paired against the doctor was the only real hottie. The one who went swimming with Magic girl, Jess and Freckle girl in nanna floral bathers. After that Mich who got Renae but for his boy next door cuteness. I went right off Leigh and realized he was just a David Spade with an untoned chest and bad hair. I bet Abbie ends up realizing he’s a dag.
None of those girls were really pretty imo, except maybe little Bekka.

12 daisy { 06.25.14 at 2:53 pm }

Oh, and yeah, Moshpit wasn’t bad.

13 Eliza { 06.25.14 at 2:56 pm }

Yeah that guy is Tom, Daisy. Nat said in some interview that Mt Isa is actually the place to be for attractive single guys.

Woops.. ‘posting too quickly’…

14 Steph { 06.25.14 at 3:28 pm }

So funny GVL! And they totally came for a party at my place. They are now tied up in the basement for my own amusement. x

15 Eliza { 06.25.14 at 5:41 pm }

I was going through a run of getting called up for jury duty but they got cancelled. On the last occasion I totally forgot about it! I was just lolling around and suddenly thought to myself.. hmmm.. I think I had jury duty today.. AHHH BEEEEEEP!!!!!!!!! Ran online, checked it and so lucky it was cancelled!

LOL, GVL, were you calling Shelley Renee again on purpose, there? Shelley never looked pleased with Reggie at all.

Minderella, Gemma and Kelly – forgot about her too:

16 Eliza { 06.25.14 at 5:55 pm }

Here is Sam’s Facebook page:

Not much going on there to give away any deets. Sounds as though he is O/S.

This might be his sister or another relative. Woo, let’s so drugs and suck on lollipops. What is with young people and ‘forgetting’ to make their profiles private……

Found himself a girlfriend:

From FB sounds as though the show was filmed in September and people are sticking up for Sam. What? We can’t believe what these shows tell us?

I think that’s enough from me, peace out.. for now.

17 MT { 06.25.14 at 7:56 pm }

That football playing guy was very unattractive in my opinion but I’m glad Zoe liked him.
Renae looks like a man. She’s a shocker. And she looks just so thrilled with Mitch NOT.
It’s so unbelievable that a bloke doesn’t like Bek right???
I have watched this train wreck of a tv show but clearly there is something wrong with me. Can’t watch anymore

18 Eliza { 06.26.14 at 12:16 am }

Oop, my stalker comment is awaiting moderation.. clearly this site new I was up to mischief.

19 Alexandra { 06.26.14 at 2:49 am }

Sam lied about moving overseas…he ditched Rebekah for an equally dimly-named girl called Richelle. He’s a total dick.

20 daisy { 06.26.14 at 5:30 am }

Well, Alexandra, I think that was a given.
Hands up anyone who believed the “I’m moving overseas” story.

And he went for the girl who was all flirty and all over him. Shows the kind of choices he makes. He might not be a dick, but he thinks with a very dumb one.

21 Eliza { 06.26.14 at 5:26 pm }

I stalked him down on Facebook and found the new girlfriend too.. yeahhh procrastinating.. it’s in my comment above but it’s awaiting moderation. I will just post the link the new girlfriend:

I would like to hear his side, but then again, yep, he did make the dud choice in the first place. Take a look at some of his photos, he looks like he is still in the ‘just having a good time, not looking for anything ‘serious’ phase’:

22 Eliza { 06.26.14 at 5:28 pm }

No wonder he wasn’t Jess’ ‘magic man’.

23 Mimi { 06.26.14 at 10:23 pm }

Top job Eliza