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My Kitchen Rules – Victoria

I don’t know if I can ever forgive My Kitchen Rules for the experience of having seen a few unwanted minutes of Home and Away. Even more unbelievable than the dialogue (dire) and the acting (worse) is the idea that people might want to watch it AGAIN online. Say it ain’t so!

After last night’s debut I didn’t think I’d bother with another date with Come Masterchef With Me. For all of you other reality TV dependants out there, you’ll know how chockers the schedule is right now, so Raver has had to prioritise viewing and asked me if I’d have a look in on our competitive cooks and report back. Below is not so much a recap, as a few points that, if I hadn’t been typing them down, there would have been various things flying at the TV, so I guess I should be grateful for that.

  • Is Channel Seven really wedded to that “most renowned chefs” line, because it really pisses me off. I hadn’t heard of Peter Evans until he was beaten by an amateur who has gone on to do… what, exactly?… In fact, MKR’s Peter Evans isn’t even the most renowned Peter Evans.
  • Is Manu only wearing the choker because he doesn’t like being a sex symbol? It’s working. Hate.
  • I’d be more inclined to accept the rampant heterosexuality of the Victorian boys if the editors weren’t so desperately editing in gratuitous shots of girls in bikinis. And if they didn’t stare at each other with such scary intensity.
  • It should be taken as read in competitive reality shows that each contestant/group will bring their “A” game and try to “impress” those voting for them. So stop saying it as though it’s novel, Queenslanders! And perhaps this would be a snappy 30 mins if all the stating of the obvious was left out.
  • Sure, each group is from a different state, but that’s a completely different proposition to “being honoured to represent” their state. Those boys don’t represent me; I’m sure readers from other states feel the same way about the folks who, by accident or design, inhabit their state-space.
  • Didn’t Mossy explain last night that the rules meant they couldn’t sub ingredients? Why, then, weren’t the guys given more of a pasting for their painted crays? And, seriously, is anybody buying the “typo” explanation for their truffle oil?
  • “Atrocity” is a word I think should be used for truly egregious acts (genocide, human rights abuses). Not truffle oil, as disappointing as it is.
  • Mel and whats-his-name. I can’t even be bothered going through all the things they said that pissed me off. There were a lot.
  • Okay, just one example: Mel being pissed off that the Queenslanders and the Westralian were wearing jeans. Did she see what Paul was wearing? Glass houses.
  • Oh, and one more: “It’s a bit like putting olives on the menu? And then serving olive oil.” Well, at least she didn’t call white-truffle-gate an atrocity.
  • People who are so confident in their cooking ability that they 1. think it’s worth $100K and 2. have more than one signature dish should know that you don’t serve risotto and pasta. They should also stop short of congratulating themselves on their ravioli not bursting if the pasta sheets are half a centimetre thick. That’s what stopped them from bursting. Oh, and stopped them from being, you know, edible.
  • It pissed me off that the guys tried to pass off the stupid risotto/pasta decision on not being able to change the menu once it was submitted. They submitted the menu in the first place, right?
  • Why doesn’t Seven show us the same respect it showed the contestants – they had a week between dinner parties. We had to suffer two in a row. At least now there’s a break until Monday, although the odd scheduling smacks of a homeMADE level disaster, to me.
  • And the dinner party tonight looked just as boring as last night’s. Dancing? Pull out a pinata and maybe we’ll call that entertainment.

Finally, it wasn’t all a hate-fest. I liked:

  • Manu’s disappointment, repeatedly expressed, over the truffle.
  • Mossy. In fact, I think I love Mossy a little bit. He seemed to forget that he was in a competition with the others. Although perhaps his strategy of sharing a beer with them to raise their spirits after their disastrous first course might explain how it took him several hours to mash some potato.
  • the fact that the guys had a spare stash of saffron.
  • “Young boys playing with big toys”.


1 CG { 02.02.10 at 10:33 pm }

Oh, Injera…aren’t you being a wee bit too hard on MCR? At least there is starting to be some things to snark at like that bw*&$@tch from SA.

Although I do agree that the random scheduling and some other aspects of MCR do force a comparison with the disaster that was HomeMADE.

Anyhoo, some of my random observations from tonight’s epi:

— What the hell was with the dirty, murky water in the fishbowl in centre of table – ewww – poor fishies!

— Who’s house was it – must be mum and dad’s? And how old are these guys. The more I saw the more I thought they must be very recent graduates of Scotch College and in this on some kind of a dare?

– And nup, not gay – did you catch the whistling at the girls when the replayed the beach scene. Ch7 really went overboard to ensure we all knew they were just best – hetero – mates.

— More tricky editing just like on MC…playing the VIC boys up to be the biggest threats in the comp and then they fall flat on their faces.

— Mossy was being so sweet in encouraging the boys, and giving the overly-critical SA mates some grief for being too bitchy and then BOOM! – Mossy gives ‘em a 5 overall! Haha, maybe going first / early is not a disadvantage because once you’d been judged you become a more critical/harder judge and with a over-riding interest in saving your own ass?!

— What is the point of the contestants knowing their score and knowing (Mossy and Gabe) that they are safe into the next round? This means they can vote the upcoming contestants more with a view to knocking out/down their competition and over-marking those they feel they can knock out in the final rounds?

— Chefs drinking beer thru whole meal…including chocolate pudding…yuck.

— I still don’t understand the format. After these dinner party rounds only one “couple is dropped and then what?

I’ll still watch. Fits in nicely with CDMW which follows on Lifetime and I’m not into the Biggest Loser or dancing shows. But it will be interesting to see how ratings go and if MCR starts to head for HomeMADE territory and a quick wrap-up.

Wondering though if ABC will be cunning, knock off Kerry O’Brien at 7;30pm and bring in the Im-POHster’s new show in the same time slot? Hahaha.

Great job, Injera! You’re so funny.

2 Laura { 02.02.10 at 11:25 pm }

I think that I actually hate the SA couple. Either way, I want to punch them in the face. The WA couple are almost as infuriating.

Mossy was sweet and I understand why he scored them 5 after his meagre result last night. I also really like the Qld girls. They’re critical when necessary but they are also congratulatory when deserved.

I would prefer that the couples were just “the best cooks in Australia” based on an audition process, rather than from each state. But I guess that 7 is just following the My Restaurant Rules formula, and trying to maintain a distinction from Masterchef.

3 Wurstsemmel { 02.02.10 at 11:42 pm }

I watched inspite of myself. And now I have to keep watching if only to see obnoxious Ms SA come unstuck. I LOATHE her and while she boasts about how her dinner parties are the hottest ticket in town, and she thinks she’s the bees knees, I have to marvel at the enomity of her level of deception.

Agree, Injera, the Manu choker is just wrong. Pure and simple

Definitely a one run show.

I think Mosy just might get a fan club following from this. I loved thecaring, supportive moves, followed by giving the lowest mark.

Great commentary as always, Injera

4 Wurstsemmel { 02.02.10 at 11:50 pm }


5 Laura { 02.03.10 at 12:32 am }

Yes I forgot to mention that I loved your commentary Injera. I read it to my household and we all concur with everything you said!

6 crabtech { 02.03.10 at 12:38 am }

The problem is it doesn’t know what it wants to be and too long to focus on someone preparing dinner. As someone said we can’t tste the food who wants to watch boring delutional people being bitchy. Don’t care what happens to any of them. I will not watch any more. I’m e njoying this discussion though. Keep it up everyone

7 Jeb { 02.03.10 at 9:31 am }

they got to give the SA girl more screen time. It became her show when she said she’d send people home if they showed up at her place wearing jeans.

8 Injera { 02.03.10 at 9:50 pm }

CG – that fish tank water was AWFUL! I’d be reluctant to eat seafood at a place with such a scungy fishbowl.

Can you imagine the pearl-clutching if crumpet Kerry had to give way for Poh? Hilarious!

Laura – I was a bit surprised by Mossy’s score, not that I thought it was undeserved. A decent cake doesn’t make up for very ordinary entree and main and some flashbacks to a blue-light disco.

Wurstsemmel – ah, just like me – you thought you could escape the lure of MKR but it pulled you back! I think I’ll probably be in for the long haul, now… Sad. Just hope that Manu gets the choker off (at the very least!).

Oh, and thanks all for the feedback!

See, crabtech, I agree that watching people prepare a dinner is a bit dull, which is why CDWM lifts that part up with some snarky narration. I am, however, shallow enough to enjoy watching people being bitchy. My main problem with MKR is that the bitchiness is not really that entertaining!

Jeb – I think they’ll probably make sure Ms SA gets a decent amount of screen time. I’m wondering if they are setting her up for a big fail…!

9 sourkraut { 02.03.10 at 10:31 pm }

Watched the first ep but my comments on that would be old news.
Somehow this show has sucked me in. more natural than MC A wonderful psychological study. Crappy cooking so far, but who cares.
The dish I think will be most delicious will be revenge served cold followed by a main of good old schadenfreude.
The NSWers dont realise how lucky they were to go first. they can now pretend to be nice and sling the steaming brown effluent soup in all directions.
The Vics meal looked crappy. Bloody Risotto again. i swear i will never eat it again after the Andre’s Masterchefs pink effort. Anyway when the ginormous wanker shaped plate came out with a TINY bit of food in an egg cup artfully decorated with a- sparrows- guts slices I burst out laughing and made the comment who eats the plate or the asp strips?
Then to my utmost surprise Manu criticised the same theme (albeit in a different way) so i thought to myself, maybe this gent is not a total clown after all!
Trout rav, OMG what were you thinking. I hope that’s the last of the Italian meals we will see. Cook me something Indian!!!!!
“There’s always a solution to a problem” the Vics boldly quoted during the cooking. PITY it did not come true for the ravioli.

Stop The representation of your state crap!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! All you contestants you are representing yourselves!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Cant wait for the schadenfreude when Mel furks up her turn, and likewise for the tall WA er. Pride verily goeth b4 a fall, just ask Russel HO HO HO

10 sourkraut { 02.03.10 at 10:42 pm }

I will gladly lend you my handy dandy jiffy wiffy AUTOMATIC No hands needed Acme Ajax exocet tv destroying missile, I did not need it for survivor this time.

11 Injera { 02.04.10 at 2:20 pm }

Thanks, sourkraut, I think the Acme Ajax exocet TV destroying missile would come in handy!

Interesting comment in today’s Green Guide: all the contestants are WASPs, which contrasts with the relative diversity of the Masterchef cast. (Of course, I think calling them WASPs is a bit presumptuous – how can we tell they’re all protestant?).

12 Food and television: a match sometimes made in heaven… | …blah blog blah… { 02.04.10 at 2:20 pm }

[…] had her hands full with the Survivor finale, Biggest Loser and So You Think You Can Dance, so I watched it on her behalf.  Unfortunately, I’d forgotten my severe personality flaw that means two episodes in a row […]

13 sourkraut { 02.04.10 at 10:12 pm }

WASP may be just referring to some future waspish behaviour (I hope)
I would be greatly surprised if they were ALL protestants (not that that would bother me ) If there were catholics and protestants they could Multi-task?