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Guest Post: Restaurant Revolution – The Food Review Are In

We are supposed to get the results of all the critic’s visits tonight, which I find distinctly odd. I certainly don’t remember seeing any visits from Prune Faced Missie (hereafter referred to as PFM) nor from John Lethlean. Presumably one or ‘tother of them visited Adelaide or Perth last time, but if it was shown on my TV I must have been blinking. Or the visits were blinking fast. Maybe they’ll show them at the beginning of tonight’s show? But they showed the end of everybody’s service, so that wouldn’t make sense either.


Puzzled, of Brisbane.

The previews also hint – okay, make it pretty clear – that the top two will be Sydney and Melbourne, which would puzzle and bother me. I quite like young Dom, but Erez told us his food and service was generally less than good. And Melbourne! They can just fuck right off. So I hope that is just so much hokum, and dear little Adelaide will be near the top.

Onwards. (Why do I give such long intros when I am recapping a 2 hour show? Because I’m an idiot? Probably.)

They immediately tell us two teams will be visited and reviewed.Yes!

Tonight PFM goes to Perth, John to Adelaide and the secret critic, to Melbourne (I thought he or she was there the other night?).

John from Brisbane says they didn’t leave until left 3 or 4 am so are pretty tired. Neil’s advice was that it will get easier. Maggie says they are on a learning curve. Well since they started with zero experience, of course they are on a learning curve. But she’s so sweet, I can forgive her for stating the bleeding obvious.

Dom is bleary eyed after only 2 hours sleep. He tells his mum (and us) that the review will be given on TV in the middle of the restaurant while it is full.

The teams are opening for lunch again today.

Melbourne are told that the secret critic either came last night or will visit today. Aha!

Adelaide are told that they will be reviewed by John.

PFM will go to Perth.

In Adelaide, Reine’s husband phones to say their baby daughter has to go to hospital. He says she’s okay – it’s just precautionary. But naturally she’s worried.

Maz wants to take a video of Nathan working in the kitchen for Facebook.

Carmole explains to the waitresses about the ingredients in the dishes.

Everyone opens their doors right on midday, although we are not told yet how many people Carmole is permitted by the chef to seat at once.

But Melbourne’s supplies are not there yet, so Nathan is chucking a tanty. Understandable, but being Nathan, he’s very good at it.

John Lethlean arrives in Adelaide with a friend. He hopes Asa is in control in the kitchen, as he is the head chef.

In Perth PFM arrives with a friend. She hopes the chef is working with the sisters and not overworking them. Sounds as though she knows exactly what to expect. 😉 She comments to her friend that the waitress says everything is cooked fresh and says well so it should be.

Reine kisses John and he says he doesn’t usually kiss people at the front of house. She is embarrassed, but comments to us that she now thinks of him as a friend. Um, no, he’s now your critic, lovey. He notices the waiter puts his wine bottle down on the table but doesn’t bother to even open the bottle.

In Melbourne, Maz is still intent on videoing Nathan for social media. He is not happy with “Marilyn”,  telling her to just do her job.

PFM is over ordering to see what they will do. Her croquettes are still tepid in the middle.

In Adelaide, John is not overwhelmed by the heirloom vegetable garden he has for entreé. But his friend’s bacon broth and rabbit tortellini is much better.

In Brisbane there’s a hair in someone’s food. He discovers it when he’s nearly finished the dish. Oowaa. Consternation in the kitchen.

PFM has octopus and is disappointed with the dish. The reason she over ordered was to see if they would stagger the dishes, but they pretty much all came at once. She says it’s evident that Carmole has no idea what she’s doing at the pass, just standing there looking at the dockets.

John is disappointed with his main course. He says it’s a pleasant seafood soup, but not bouillabaisse. Reine is still worrying about her daughter. She is trying to explain the Athena (their sister) chocolate plate but she is blanking out. She should tell him her baby girl has just been taken to hospital! But I suppose that would be unprofessional. John says the dessert is pleasant. The service is not polished but okay.

PFM’s general opinion is that the menu is greatest hits of Spanish food. She is underwhelmed.

Carmole is expecting a call from Jock and not expecting it to be good.

Nathan is just hoping the secret critic says he is more than a D grade chef.

In Brisbane they listen to what Neil Perry said about them. We pretty much heard this the other night. On the whole he says their first night was not too bad.

Jock asks Carmole were they looking forward to the visit from PFM. They say they always look forward to seeing Jess. Hearty laughter from everybody else. She found it strange to see empty tables with crowds outside. She explains that she deliberately over ordered dishes to see what would happen and too many came out at once. The croquettes were a sad mushy paste.

Sydney. Erez says that basically Dom fell short of the mark.

In Adelaide, John says Reine made them feel welcome. We hear again about the waiter forgetting about the wine.

Melbourne. Jock can’t reveal the identity of the secret critic, so Jock will read his critique. The SC likes the feel of the restaurant. They also have spelling mistakes including parmigiana, which is unforgiveable in an Italian restaurant.

The lamb whatevery isn’t sticky as promised and the dessert something or other has a chemical taste. For front of house, Maz’ role as greeter is awkward. She hovers in annoying manner. Nathan thinks Maz is doing a great job so far. (Is that why he criticizes her so much?)

The scores:

6.5 to Brisbane (Cut to sour faced Nathan) John says he thinks their menu was spelled correctly too. 😆

Two teams each scored 6:

Adelaide and Melbourne.

Maz thinks some people just don’t like human contact. You stupid Oxford punt, there is a time and place for human contact. Arriving at a restaurant for dinner isn’t it.

Perth are 4th. My mouth hangs open. 5.5. How can those stupid bints beat sweet Dom? Yes, he’s made mistakes, but they are completely hopeless!

He gets 5. He takes it on the chin because he’s a gentleman.

Now Jock tells them that they can also score points from how profitable their restaurant is. So they need to push for profit.

Maz is still harping on about the critique. She is changing the furniture, so she’ll be on the other side of the desk. If it means she won’t be so in your face with the customers, that sounds useful.

Dom tells his staff he’s still proud of them. Such a nice boy.

In Brisbane they check their dishes and ask the staff to push the ones with higher profit margins. Meanwhile Maggie is pushing for better deals from their dealers.

Nathan has a meeting with his staff and as usual is rude.  He childishly plays the Danger fucking Zone as they begin their next service.

La Linea is out of gas. Ha ha ha ha. Bad Rosie. The delivery man points out that they’re not really out of gas at all. I think he is saying they’ve hooked up the doowicky to the dooverlackie, or it’s just plain in the wrong spot. I laugh some more. Much more. Chef Chad accepts the blame like a man. That we see.

Adelaide has problems with the oven. I don’t understand how or why, but they seem to keep cooking.

Dom welcomes his crowd. He is upset he can only seat 60 at a time, when there are so many people waiting out there. He is trying to push drinks and side dishes.

The Adelaide restaurant is only half full, so Reine goes out on the street and offers 10% off to people and manages to find some custom.

Maggie saves a table for her family but they are running late. With long queues, Justine gives the table away. Maggie walks away in tears. Looks like stress and lack of sleep to me. She soon comes back and mother and daughter are at peace once more.

In Melbourne, Nathan is furious with Kerryn or Karen. Or Kirrin. He wants her fired. Apparently she is not cool under pressure. Just like you then, huh? He tells Maz it’s her job to do the firing, since she is in charge of front of house. I hope for the sake of this girl’s dignity, we don’t see the firing on TV.

Time for more scoring.

Dom doesn’t think he’ll be able to handle last place again.

Adelaide is worried they’ll be last.

Dom reminds his staff to not complain and to take it on the chin. He’s a gentleman I tells ya, my boy’s a gentleman.  The top team will gain a table and the losing team will lose a table. Well that can hardly affect Perth, now, can it?

Jock asks Dom how it feels to be at the bottom. He replies pretty average.

An extra table means extra cash.

Carmole nods. I chuckle, because, well, how can it possible affect her?

5th place, with 1 point goes to Melbourne. Ha ha!

4th, with 2 points: Brisbane. *shrug*

3rd place, with 3 pts: Adelaide.

What the…? I cannot believe Perth is beating Adelaide and Brisbane. Imagine how well they’d do if they had another chef and actually let more hungry punters in at once. The mind boggles.

2nd, with 4 points is Perth.

Most profitable is Sydney. He’s thrilled.

Sydney is now on top with 10

Perth: 9.5 (grr)

Adelaide: 9

Brisbane: 8.5

Melbourne: 7

I’m pretty happy with everyone’s results, except for Perth, which seems ludicrous. Unless Chef Chad knew what he was doing all along? Except for hooking up gas bottles, that is.

Dom thanks his staff for their hard work. Next week, the teams will judge each other. Naturally, they’ll be ridiculously hard on each other, a la Christina on The Hotplate. Although they will be better dressed than her. And have better palates. (Sorry, couldn’t resist that one.)

August 10, 2015   115 Comments

Guest Post: Restaurant Revolution – And The Restaurants Open

Rosie gives us the latest on the opening of the restaurants on Restaurant Revolution:

As we begin, Jock tells us that there’ll be fireworks both inside and outside tonight. (I note Dom still has his ridiculous logo.) There are 5 days to go until Opening Night.

Melbourne says they have their pride back. They’ve been given a second chance and they are not going to blow it. Maz says they hope the experts see them as bowls that have flowers in. So poetic. So nauseating.

Dom is happy with the ten grand he was awarded last time. He will listen to the experts this time and see a professional for a new logo.

Adelaide is happy of course. The experts are impressed that they got past their sibling rivalry.

Perth are still hopeless. I mean, really hopeless. I don’t understand why they don’t just walk away now. Oh that’s right, then they wouldn’t be on TV. Or are they so ridiculously deluded that they think they have a tiny chance at winning this thing? Because they absolutely, positively do not.

Jock rings everyone. He says to think big and plan a party. A launch party.

Dom finally gets a decent logo. Pity he clings to the stupid name.

David in Adelaide wants to plan the entertainment for the launch party. His siblings let him.

Nathan seems awfully rude to his staff. Yeah, great way to motivate them, there, chummy. Then again, on the whole, he’s pretty rude to everyone, all the time.

The Perth girls bring in their Spanish grandma to offer constructive advice to the chefs. I’m sure the chefs pay great attention to her comments just as I’m sure the girls would even notice.

The camera is there as Dom’s alarm wakes him up. Really? Oh come on. He always has that just awake look. Pull the other one, Channel 7. And get fucked for daring to sue Channel 9 over The Hotplate while you’re at it. I mean, yeah, it’s a rip off, we know, but isn’t every reality show a rip of some other reality show somewhere?

Why are they bothering with a “launch party” instead of just plain opening the restaurants? Seems all a bit pointless to me, not to mention unrealistic. But I’m just an old grouch,  so pay no attention to me.

It’s raining in Melbourne. Nathan has a lot of anxiousness. I think he means anxiety, but being Nathan, I’m sure he’s right and I’m wrong. 😆 The rain is pouring. There are leaks throughout the restaurant. Maz has put buckets around to catch said water which Nathan is angry about. What, he’d rather people would slip over and break their necks? Nathan  is screaming at Maz. Now there’s a surprise. She tells him to stick to the kitchen.

The Adelaide siblings are all nervous and excited. They are doing home style cooking with a modern twist. It’s their dream. The interior is like their old home. But bigger, I’m guessing.

Perth. The sisters say they are nervous and packing themselves. But unfortunately not, alas, into a large case so they can be sent away. There will be a combination of things they like with reference to Spanish things. No, I didn’t really think it made sense either. But hey, they’re going to win, remember? *giggle*

In Sydney, Dom realised at the last minute he had no champagne glasses but his father comes through for him and gets them.

The power goes out in Perth. Ooer. But only in the kitchen it seems. It’s already out in our sisters’ brains.

It’s party time in Brisbane!

Dom is cranky in the kitchen. The food is not up to standard. And he is feeling shitty about that.

David in Adelaide is happy. There’s a woman with an enormous snake. Yuck! I’d be right out that door!

Maz doesn’t think people have noticed the buckets collecting the water. Ash is there but is not happy about the bread being cut like a doorstop. But I bet she’s happy about the camera finding her. 😀

In Perth, the girls don’t seem to even know about the blackout. Nicole is missing. Or is it Carmen. They seem pretty much interchangeable anyway, so maybe I’ll just call them Carmole from now on. Chef Chad is running the kitchen as well as the floor since no one else is. He is not happy, and I don’t blame him.

David makes a wee speech to wild applause.

As does Dom. Also to wild applause.

A sign comes up on each restaurant’s big TV screen, saying: Standby for announcement.

Jock tells them (in front if the crowds) that they’ll be opening to the paying public tomorrow (Monday). He’s also about to let them in on a secret. The critics will visit them to score them out of ten on their food, service and atmosphere. But! There will be one more expert they don’t know about who will be scoring them the same as the others. The Secret Critic. Ooooh.

After the party Chef Chad tells the Carmole in Perth that it was bad but the feedback she got was that it was good so she’s not worried. My eyes did their usual that buck and wing.

And everyone is open for lunch.

Poor Adelaide. It’s not just raining there, there are massive leaks in the kitchen. Onto the electric box. They have to shut it down until they can get somebody in. They explain the situation to the disappointed crowd.

Dom is told Erez will be reviewing them at dinner.

Brisbane is told that Neil will be reviewing them at dinner.

Nathan and Maz are told the Secret Critic will be reviewing them at dinner. I thought they weren’t going to tell them until it was over?

Chad says they can only let ten people in at a time. I watched the second half of this last night after the Hotplate and thought he was completely nuts, but after the total balls up of the launch party, I can now see where he’s coming from. On the one hand, he is losing the girls money, but on the other hand, the girls are losing themselves money as well as lots and lots of good will by ballsing up all the orders.

Carmole is pissed off at being told by the chef to only bring in ten people at a time. Well whose fault would that be, love?

Nathan says his food was good, it was the service that was the problem. Of course darling. You are perfect and everyone else is always at fault. Nasty, nasty little man that you are.

Neil Perry is in Brisbane for dinner and says he is really excited and can’t wait to eat their food. He asks his wife what she thinks of the decor. After a pause, she says it’s eclectic. I think that’s polite for “crappy”.

Erez and his wife Natasha are at Dom’s. Strangely, he leaves his car and walks in alone, then his wife magics herself beside him. He likes the new logo. He mentions that the waitress seems nervous.

In Perth they are still not letting people in and most of the tables are empty. The girls are feeling bad. Well here’s a clue: free and for nothing. Why not get yourself some training before entering the fucking competition! Morons.

In Melbourne Nathan is seeking perfection, but Maz has a more relaxed approach. I think she means she really doesn’t give a shit.

In Brisbane, the Mexican waiter suggests to Neil and his wife they have one of each of the entreés (I think). They agree. Maggie is avoiding Neil because she is so nervous.

Someone says to Maz that their dish too oily. She’s very laid back as she says we’ll fix it.

Erez’ order went out from the kitchen without Dom’s stamp of approval. Erez found it to be dry and underseasoned. Oh dear.

Maggie finally reaches Neil and gives him a hug of welcome. She explains that she didn’t go sooner because she was too afraid. He adores her.

In Melbourne Maz relays a complaint to one of Nathan’s staff and he rips into her. In front of everyone, of course. He is such a prick. She is just incompetent rather than a bitch I think.

In Brisbane, Neil is not loving his tostada. The dessert is a chocolate coffee fondant which he presumes to be recreating a cappuccino. He doesn’t mind it. I’d have said mocha myself, but what do I know?

Erez is disappointed. He says it’s pub food at best. He tells the waitress that everything is fine. When she relays that to Dom, he says that’s the worst thing he could say. Erez tells his wife that you would send your best staff to wait on a critic or visiting chef, but he really hopes that waitress is not their best.

In Perth the problems continue. Chad says it’s really difficult working with girls who have no experience. And, he forgot to say, who seem to think need no experience. I wonder what they’ll try next. Brain surgery?

Adelaide is worried about their profit margin.

Nathan is rapt. He’s really proud of their first service.

The Donehues are happy.

In Sydney Dom asks Erez how he went or will he have to wait. Erez pauses and Dom says, I know, I’ll have to wait. Erez assures him it gets easier.

In Perth, the girls are worried about the empty tables.

Neil Perry is very concerned for the Brisbane team. He thinks there was a general feeling that their menu was out of balance and they need more crunch, more freshness.

So, next Thursday should be very interesting with the critics (especially the Sekrit Kritik) giving their reports. Don’t miss it! Unless of course you have something more interesting to do, like wash your hair. 😉

August 5, 2015   17 Comments

Rosie’s Restaurant Revolution Roundup Recap

Is there anyone in Australia watching more reality TV then Rosie? I think not. Bless her for writing up a Restaurant Revolution Roundup Recap. Over to Rosie:

Since Channel 7 is kindly broadcasting 4½ hours worth of the show in one hit, I thought I’d have a stab at giving it a bit of a recap for you. It may well be shortened, as the broadcast tonight obviously is, so it’s not my fault if I miss any good bits. 😉 Did I say shortened? Not really, because as recaps go, this will be one long-arsed motherfucker. I apologize in advance for making your eyes glaze over. And you owe me no apologies for being unable to get past these very words here. 😆

From the bits I did watch during the week, it seems to be an exact copy of the old My Restaurant Rules, except that MRR gave them normal premises to work from, whereas RR has been mean enough to just give them a bunch of packing cases, er, (slaps self for the first time of many tonight I suspect), I mean shipping containers. Oh, and when I say RR, I do not mean our beloved Emma, I mean Rest. Rev.

They have four judges who are:

Neil Perry, restaurateur, of whom we’ve all heard.

Erez Gordon, front of house specialist.

John Lethlean, allegedly famous food critic, but of whom I’ve never heard, and

Jess Ho, brand strategist.

The presenter is Jock Zonfrillo, a restaurateur who is Scottish born, which is probably why he speaks with such an enticing Scottish accent.

The contestants are:

Dom Aboud, from Sydney, who has called his place (I am wincing as I am typing this) Somewhere Nice. He is a chef.

Siblings, David, Asa, Reine and Anthony Donehue from Adelaide. Their restaurant will be called 28 Street. They are all chefs.

From Brisbane we have John McIntosh and (I presume) his girlfriend/partner, Justine Yeong and her mum, Maggie Yeong. Now I already know from the bits and pieces I watched during the week that none of these three is a chef and what’s more, they started the competition without having a chef lined up. Is that crazy, or is that crazy? Their restaurant will be called Puerto.

Nathan Scarfo and Maz Koutsonikolas are a couple in lurve from Melbourne. Nathan is the chef. Their restaurant is called Yum Yum. *puke*

Carmen and Nicole Watts are sisters from Perth. They call their restaurant La Linea. But… they don’t have a chef either! Are these people mad! They don’t even have any experience in hospitality. Completely crackers.

They all get text messages to go to the site of their future restaurants. They don’t know yet it’s not an actual restaurant. Jock tells us what to expect. They are all hoping to win the $200 000 prize.

He rings them all to tell them they need to pitch the concept of their restaurant to a panel of experts in 72 hours, plus be examined on a plate of their food. They need to choose the colour of the outside of their restaurant right now.

In Brisbane, Maggie suggests orange and blue, and the others agree.

Dom is going for blue because he wants to blend in with the local area, and there’s a blue edging to the brownish buildings in the area.

The Adelaide group agree on gold.

Dom’s restaurant will be in the Centenary Square in Parramatta. Right next door to one of Jamie Oliver’s restaurants. Hmm.

In Melbourne Nathan and Maz are arguing about what to put where. They have been together for just over a year. They choose a bright (and ghastly IMHO) pink.

Each team is provided with a builder to help. But they need money.

In Adelaide, they find the colour is bright yellow not gold. David says red, as he originally wanted, would be better. They are calling it 28 Street because that’s the last place they all lived together. David is being very bossy. He and Reine both get tearful. Oh my Gawd.

Nathan and Maz decide on Yum Yum as a fun name to go with their pink restaurant. I gag.

The Brisbane team decide to dress up. *deep groan*

Dom visits his tattoo artist to design the logo for his place. Oh dear. I thought it looked like a friggin’ tat, but didn’t realise its origin. Is he nuts? A tattoo artist to design… no, Dom, just no. Jebus. Dom’s mum is worried about him. He has wound up in hospital in the past from overdoing things. Or from drug use perhaps… ?

Maz’ laptop has just crashed. Is it bad that I laughed? Nathan is distinctly unsupportive.

They all turn up to Jock’s restaurant to beg for money. At his invitation, let me stress.

Jock tells them that 100K is up for grabs. And who the judges are. Each will have time to plate up the meal that will have been cooked to their specifications.

Dom is first. He cops to the tattoo artist. Jess says the food is nice, but not the logo. John thinks maybe Dom would be better as a front of house guy than chef.

The girls from Perth explain that they are half Spanish, half Australian. Their Restaurant is named for a small town in the south of Spain where their family is from. John is worried that they have no chef in mind. As is Jess. As is Rosie.

The Brisbane team look like idiots in their idiot costumes. Their food will be a fusion of Mexican and Asian. Jess is stony faced at Maggie’s antics as she leaps around. John says the food is undercooked, but isn’t that a reflection on Jock’s chef, or whoever cooked the food?

The Adelaide group is next and break down halfway through, but carry on to say they grew up with David often being more of a dad than a brother.

Maz says Nathan is Italian and she’s Greek. Maz says she will be maitre’D. Neil has a problem with the name Yum Yum. Jess agrees. John says there are too many puns in menu. As a critic he’d eat them for lunch. Maz cries. Neil says don’t cry. Jock says we don’t want to beat you up, just guide you onto the right path.


Adelaide gets the $40 000

Sydney gets $20 000

Melbourne and Perth each get $15 000

Brisbane gets $10 000

The Perth girls want to join in with the painting, so they don overalls over their clothes. What idiots. Shouldn’t they be spending every available minute searching for a chef? Jock rings to say they can cook for cash. Another 100k. They will each have 24 hours notice. The first to cook will be Sydney.

Dom heads to the farmer’s market. He is having troubles. He has no tables or chairs, so uses a mate to bring over his own. He’s keeping his name and logo – merely adding some colour.

The judges arrive. Jess doesn’t like the colour. Well of course she doesn’t. They hope he has changed things. Jess is not happy that the restaurant name and logo still there. They quite like the mushroom entreé. Jess is not impressed that he doesn’t know how to serve properly. He’s a chef, darling, not a waiter. Dom brings out the main course of lamb, but the plates are cold. Erez clears the table while he is still working on dessert. Dom produces the chai panna cotta and chilli chocolate soil with 2 minutes to go. Dom is not happy with himself.

There’s a feedback booth with a camera in each restaurant – just like My Restaurant Rules. Funny that.

Nathan and Maz are the next to cook for the judges. Naturally Maz disagrees with his choice of menu. She is such a bitch! I doubt she’s heard of the word supportive. Melbourne’s menu has been printed, but Nathan realises that he has stuffed up with the duck. He has realised he can’t serve duck carpaccio, ie, raw duck, so the menu must be changed. We see several shots of Maz desperately trying to hail a cab and failing. Ha. She gets back in time with the correct menu.

John in Brisbane is desperate to find a chef.

So are Carmen and Nicole who are trying to buy saucepans before finally realising they need a chef first. They find one, but then he receives a better offer elsewhere. He does agree to stay and “cook for cash” for them though.

John has found a chef to interview! His name is Dan, or possibly Sam. But I think it’s Dan. He turns out to be quite suitable. They tell him who the judges are, and that they have to cook a three course meal for them tomorrow. Dan practically passes out when he learns that one of them is Neil Perry. Alas, the next morning, no Dan. Or Sam. 😉 Frantic, Justine phones him. Sounds as though he was still asleep, after worrying about Neil Perry for most of the night. He turns up. And cooks a magnificent meal that blows the judges away.

Adelaide is next, but the judges are much less impressed here. They didn’t like the entreé and thought the idea of a deconstructed tartare sauce was ridiculous, and were particularly scathing about the fact that two of the brothers had an argument with each other at the table. Fair enough.

In Perth, John loved the greeting, but Jess says it is clear the girls have no front of house experience, and that they are flirting with the boys. Erez denies emphatically that he fell for their womanly charms. Here my eyes were doing more than rolling, they were spinning and doing cartwheels. For once I was agreeing with Jess. They all loved the food.

The girls say that she hates us, hey. No dears, just your unprofessional behaviour. Oh dear, there go my eyes again.

And now we go to Melbourne. Now this is where I get to climb into Jess for being an A grade bitch. The menus were all printed out for them, including dessert, so they’d all have noted that dessert was lavender panna cotta. So why did she have to wait until it was about to be served (10 minutes to go in a meal with a 1 hour limit) before announcing that she is allergic to lavender? Bitch. Nevertheless, Nathan produces a classic Italian dessert for her: zabaglione, and what does she say? It’s basically a cup of sweet fat. I’d have thought “thank you” would have been more appropriate. Did I mention I think she’s a bitch? Interestingly, the other judges made no comment about that little incident.

Time to hear who gets how much of the hundred grand on offer.

The judges say thank goodness Melbourne changed their name, but Maz was hopeless. She says that’s okay.

The judges also dump on Nathan, telling him his food is pretentious and that he’s not A league or B league, more like C or even D league. Then, amazingly, bitchy Maz turns to him and says well I didn’t think you were A league, I think you are C league. The other teams are shocked. As am I.

Brisbane. Jess says they showed a great sense of hospitality. John and Neil loved the food, Neil saying he expected nothing but was filled with joy.

The money.

$40 000 goes to Brisbane, who are ecstatic.

Maz says that’s great, while looking as though she’s sucking on a lemon.

$20 000 goes to Carmen and Nicole.

$15 000 goes to Dom, who looks distinctly relieved.

$15 000 also goes to Adelaide.

Nathan says coming last feels like a kick in the nuts. Maz says our restaurant won’t be all it could be, it will be a mould of cheap.

The girls in Perth will call their former chef one more time and beg. His no is pretty definite.

Meanwhile, Dom takes his logo out on the street, and most people agree it’s not suited to a restaurant. He agrees to change it, but not the stupid name.

They hear from Jock again who offers more money so they can hire staff.

Dom meets a pink haired lady while buying furniture and asks her if she’d like to turn up to interview for a job on Saturday. She does. Probably likes being on TV.

Dom’s mum wants a job and is not too impressed when he tells her she’ll have to line up and interview. I’m beginning to think Dom’s an idiot. In Brisbane, one man wipes down a table without being asked. Hardly anyone turns up to Melbourne. Heh.

The Adelaide gang has another sister who is really good at front of house.

Dom’s mother interviews perfectly. Would he have dared not employ her?

Nathan tells Maz she needs to find a bitch base. Ah, I think you’ll find she’s got that covered, mate.

A former colleague of Dom’s fronts up, so he employs her on the spot as front of house manager.

They are back in Adelaide to beg for money once more.

1st place $20 000

2nd $10 000

3rd $10 000

4th and 5th zilch

Carmen and Nicole reintroduce themselves. They say they have employed 8 people. They explain, to sharp indrawn breaths from the judges, and other contestants, their plan to poach a chef from elsewhere. Neil tells them that would be dastardly. John asks if it comes to the worst case scenario, what would they do? They explain they have 4 chefs, and they could make one of those head chef. One of the girls will be maitre’D. She will need to pick up her skills.

After they leave, Jess says they are in the same head space as at their first interview.

Adelaide just want to walk away with their pride. Reine will be general manager. David is taking a step back. Asa is redesigning the menu. Neil asks what the money is for. Reine explains that today is about pride, not money.

Dom shows them his new logo, but he hasn’t changed the name. They all look stony faced. He explains he’d lose the personal touch if he changed the name. He has 9 staff now, and any money will be for training his staff. They say you are willing to bring in outside help in some areas but tell him his logo is a joke. Ooh. It is, but it’s better than it was. And he really should lose the name, even though Mr R loves it. Sigh. He takes it on the chin. Erez says we’ve discussed it at every meeting. Neil congratulates him for employing his mother. Outside, Dom says it hurts that they called his logo a joke. He is only 23 and it really shows at times.

The Brisbane people aren’t all that impressive.

Nathan and Maz tell them their restaurant’s new name is Scarfo, Nathan’s surname.

Reine says they are really good at faking it now. I think she’s right. Maggie says we see each other as friends, but they see us as competitors.

The money:

Jock says this is the last chance at any cash before the opening.

$20 000 goes to Melbourne

$10 000 goes to Adelaide

And $10 000 to Dom, who is really stoked.

Jess says she keeps talking about maturity. Will he change the logo and/or the name?

Neil tells Brisbane they really suck at pitches, but they don’t have to do it any more. Very soon their restaurants will be opening, and they’ll see them there. And so will we!

August 2, 2015   31 Comments

Restaurant Revolution Versus The Hot Plate Starting Tonight

Earlier this year NINE and SEVEN had two reno shows going head to head and now they have their cooking shows, Restaurant Revolution and The Hot Plate, going head to head.

They both start tonight at 7.30pm on their respective channels and both are kinda sorta new formats.

The Hot Plate is about professional cooks/restauranteurs in a state based competition. They get to judge and score the other peoples restaurants along with the new faces to our screen Tom Parker-Bowles and Scott Pickett. My Kitchen Rules much?

Well at least there will be people who have some professional cooking credentials so what could possible go wrong?

Tom Parker-Bowles is a food writer from the UK and son of…. and Scott Pickett is a respected chef from Melbourne. Because every food reality show needs a French judge we see Guilliame on the show as well in the elimination episodes.

See below for the contestants:

Team State Relationship Restaurant Cuisine Style Restaurant Name
Lauren “Lozz”
& Nola “Nols”
VIC Chef & Owner Seafood Wings & Fins
Christina & Tania WA Mother & Daughter Italian Christina’s
Aron & Vanessa NSW Husband & Wife Modern Australian Rocksalt
Marie & Emi QLD Best Friends Japanese Bird’s Nest
Phillipe & Pascal NSW Father & Son French Chez Pascal
Conrad & Liam WA Couple Asian Fusion Duck Duck Moose

On SEVEN they will be kicking off with Restaurant Revolution which is apparently NOT My Restaurant Rules, which I expect it will be a bit like. Teams from each State set up a pop up restaurant to serve real food to real customers. Some teams have up to four and one team i.e. NSW is a young man flying solo.

The host is Jock Zonfrillo  aka hot chef along with experts Neil Perry, Jessica Ho, John Lethlean, and Erez Gordon dishing out advice.

Neil Perry owns a swag of restaurants in Australia, Jessica Ho is a social media expert, John Lethlean is the Australian food critic and some years ago was quite the critic of reality food shows until he was asked to be on one of course.

Lastly Erez Gordon is a restaurant owner, consultant and front of house specialist.

The good thing about both these shows is there are new and fresh faces on our screens to get to know and love and loathe.

The Hot Plate on NINE 7.30pm Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday.

Restaurant Revolution on SEVEN 7.30pm Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday.


July 28, 2015   37 Comments

Restaurant Revolution Starts Tuesday 28 July On SEVEN

Channel SEVEN’s new reality show Restaurant Revolution kicks off this Tuesday. It looks like modernised version of My Restaurant Rules where rank amateurs open restaurants. And they are now open for business.

The host is Jock Zonfrillo who had all the girls blushing on Masterchef Australia last year and the experts ares Neil Perry, uber chef and Jess Ho a restaurant brand manager and social media expert.

There are teams from most states however NSW is running solo whilst some other teams have four people. It will be interesting to see how this pans out.

Here is Sydney’s promo:


The competition’s pop-up restaurants are now open!

Lunch: 12-4pm Wed-Sun

Dinner: 6-11pm Wed-Sat

SYDNEY – Centenary Square, Parramatta

MELBOURNE – St Kilda Triangle, Lower Esplanade, St Kilda

BRISBANE – Corner of Russell St and Grey St, Southbank

ADELAIDE – Victoria Square

PERTH – 103 Oxford St, Leederville


July 24, 2015   13 Comments